Can you imagine the confusion of a dead animal just falling in your front yard and witnessing that? This coworker’s spawning a whole ass religion
The gods must be crazy
ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD
I don’t think dead animals can experience confusion.
I didn’t understand any of that.
What is a wet specimen? Wouldn’t it take a bunch of balloons to float roadkill?
Why is a wet specimen and flying roadkill similar?
a wet specimen is a dead creature preserved in liquid
I’ll do you one better: what’s roadkill?
Dinner.
Spoken like a true wet specimen!
Animals that have been hit, and killed, by cars.
Now I need to know how many dollar store balloons it takes to float a raccoon.
Somewhere between 500 and 2000, or more depending on weight.
Yeah I knew anything bigger than a squirrel would require something ridiculous. I’m thinking even a squirrel would set you back a bit given the scarcity and price of helium. The balloon is the cheap part.
Helium is portrayed as second most abundant element in the universe. Not scarce at all. Our ability to collect and make use of it, that’s scarce.
A squirrel would probably need about 100 balloons.
Second most abundant doesn’t really convey how much more abundant it is compared to other elements.
About 75% of all the mass in the universe is hydrogen, about 23% is helium, 1% oxygen, and that leaves just 1% for everything else.
Next useless project: design a small rigid airship for roadkill disposal.
There’s a lot of optimization that can be done to make OEM raccoons flight worthy.
Yep. We can place them on a diet, shave their fur, pump them full of helium… We have the technology.
‘sure that happened’ but moving on from that and taking it from a comedic stance: The absolute chaos of balloon harnessed roadkill just floating into traffic idk, fucking amazing mental picture there, lmfao. Or just dropping in front of a school bus and splattering on the windshield, children screaming, etc. There’s def a couple comedy sketches that could be done there.
…I need to get funnier coworkers.
I am so fucking tempted right now. To the point of maybe next time I’m at a party supply store. To purchase one of them helium to go tanks and couple packs of balloons. I know I stand a slight chance of absolutely fucking up some ones day. But before that dread will kick in… I WILL be absolutely laughing my fucking head off with the guys to the point of needing to try to stop the funny because I’m gasping for air.
You’re going to want to run a LOT of math before you finish ordering the gas lol. I’m thinking a bird would be optimal for the hollow bones, but it also wouldn’t be confusing, just ominous. Mouse?
The blast blasted blubber beyond all believable bound. Is a magic incantation that will make you pee your pants.
i am thoroughly disturbed
No, I think he’s got a point
