So, I posted about not wanting to shave despite my family and the guy I like wanting me to. Someone on another social media platform (I know Lemmy isn’t like other social medias sometimes) said that it was because the guy I like was transphobic and saw me as a girl. Is his behavior transphobic for wanting me to shave my private areas and legs? I think it’s just a preference…
Idk, I’m attracted to men and I just don’t like body hair on anyone. It’s a personal preference, like they said
Sure. But there is also a long history of trans folk having their gender not be seen by their partners, even whilst their partner claims otherwise. The cis partner wanting their trans partner to embrace elements of gender presentation associated with the trans persons assigned gender can be a sign of that.
It might not mean that, but it’s also not automatically a personal preference, just because the partner claims it is.
It’s something that you or I or any other outsider can’t know. Which is why “It’s just personal preference” is just as wrong as “It’s transphobia”. It could be either of those things, but the only people who can ever know for sure are the people in the relationship.