Mine:
- Learn a second language and keep up with the language your parents speak. You will regret being a brat about not wanting to speak this language especially as your family members pass.
- The only opinions about you that really matter are from the people you respect and who respect you back
- Being a kind humble person, who leads their political convictions with curiosity and not self righteousness is important. As that one person said: “I am no hero and neither are you.”
- Don’t throw out your old media (mix cds, tapes, records, photos, zinee, etc) because you think they’re embarrassing. They either will not be embarrassing later or they will become expensive and you can tell them for mad bucks.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, Sunscreen would be it
My advice:
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Don’t trust the advice of generations that have left a world worse that they were born into.
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It’s way easier getting in shape young. Don’t put it off.
Don’t get too attached to anything.
Be willing to burn bridges. Some people really do need to be told to fuck off.
but as much effort as you can into math. There is the common trope about it being useless and that is I think due to peoples misunderstanding of it. Math is mental abstraction. Math problems are like excersise. No on complains push ups have not real world value. Its understood that doing them gets your body in better shape to do physical things. Similarly math helps your mind be in better shape to do mental things. Unfortunately you don’t really do it after you are no longer in school so its not bad to try and use it whenever you can. Add your purchases up in your head and try and figure out price per quantity and compare products. do suduko. Also grab elementary logic if you can as it gives a math like framework for reason.
Educate yourself, and question everything. No one is worth following blindly. If you don’t understand the “why” of something, keep digging until you do. Critically thinking is the most valuable skill you can have, so develop it as much as you can.
don’t listen to your elders, they’re the dipshits that have the planet in this mess politically and particularly ecologically, they don’t know shit.
Okay youngins make sure you do the opposite of what everyone says in this threat!
I agree with you but I’m also just being silly . Maybe the better argument is be selective as to which elders you listen to.
As someone raised by a very ignorant silent generation grandfather, there is a middleish ground. Listen to the stories. The lesson you may take may not be the intended but can be instructive. What is important to remember is their world no longer exists so take the advice with a grain of salt. While I am just as mad as anyone else with the mess we have been left, close personal older family and friends can still provide useful advice. Just… Weigh it out with your lived experience. Use what serves you. Edit: spelling
Never, ever stop asking why
Does anyone have advice specific to adhd or neurodivergence in general? Things you found helped you that took time to realise?
Be honest with yourself about your social battery. If a friend wants to watch a movie I try and tell them if I’m Down to hang and watch a movie so long as it’s okay that I don’t give it my undivided attention (aka are we gonna watch a slapstick comedy where I can check my phone or draw while watching or are we putting on Schindler’s list).
Being honest with my friends and partner as to where my focusing levels are at has saved a lot of conflict and has made people feel more respected (from what they’ve told me!)
Exercise and eating right actually do help. It’s just really hard to do without meds for me
It seems obvious now, but it took me too long to realize I don’t have issues focusing on things, I just have a hard time focusing on things I’m not interested in. I was a terrible student in grade school and took some time off after I graduated before going to university. That time away allowed me to mature and gain the discipline I needed to get through the stuff I wasn’t interested in. I then breezed through my major because I loved it.
Don’t spend as much energy on trying to improve the things that you’re bad at. Figure out your strengths and lean into them.
If you have ADHD, get medicated. While it’s no replacement for good habits, it makes starting those good habits SO much easier. I wish I had started taking it 15 years sooner.
If you also have ASD, a lot of people aren’t going to understand you. The way you view the world is different. Be kind and be true to yourself and you’ll meet lots of people who appreciate your difference.
Spending time being doing nothing actually helps your focus later, boredom is good for you and actually promotes creativity.
Don’t multitask, you’ll just end up half-assing every task.
If you have the means, see a psychologist who specializes working with people who are neurodivergent. It will greatly improve your communication skills. If you’re in a serious relationship, get couples counseling even if things are going great. This will help you break down any communication barriers before they have the opportunity to become resentment.
I could keep adding to this list, but having an exercise routine is probably one of the best things I did to improve my focus. Plus I also get the long term health benefits of strength training.
These are good.
Do your best. Make the best choice you can and consciously decide against second-guessing yourself later. Feel free to learn about yourself from any inclination to second-guess, it could be your morals chaffing against your actions.
Be kind. To those you love and those you don’t. Give yourself some grace when imperfections monopolize your focus.
Learn about yourself. It’s going to be a lot easier to make decisions when you know yourself.
Don’t make trends your identity.
You don’t want to look back on your life and all the photos you have of yourself, just to realize every fashion choice, purchase, event you went to, and way you talked was all because it was seen as cool, trendy, or “normal.”
Live your life in a way that feels right and true to who you are, and what your values are, not what anybody else things is “right” for you to do.
This life has no meaning. Absolutely none. Do what you enjoy. You don’t need a “purpose,” grind culture is toxic and will only lead to burnout. Slow down and listen to the birds sing.
do you think that you should do what you enjoy at the expense of another person? like (in an extreme example) to harm/assault/ hurt someone because you enjoy it?
I think hedonism is important, but it comes at a cost. The candle the burns twice as bright and all that. At the same time if you never fuck around, you’ll never find out.
I think far too often young people go through life thinking they already know who they are, instead of treating life as an opportunity to find out who they are. They become calcified, ossified in their beliefs about their own identity, a constant and repeated telling themselves of who they are in an effort to believe these things.
An alternative approach is to try to break down who you are, repeatedly and continuously. To try new things, to change the situation. Leave a city without warning and move somewhere you don’t know the language. Abandon your belongings, your phone, your identity and start over. Change the situation entirely. Begin to understand what is you and what is the world. If you move from place to place, and you find yourself always confronted by the same types of people, maybe you are seeing a reflection of something you are bringing with you from place to place.
There is a very western identity of “knowing” who you are while simultaneously having done no exploration of who that person might be. I find it very curious.
Super interesting perspective. Thank you!
In regard to the second paragraph, I am very much a metaphoric horse who will not even be led to water, let alone drink. This has, unsurprisingly led to a great many humbling moments in my life. In regards to those who “know themselves”, those who are most sure are those least humbled. Even if misfortune never visits you, always question yourself, your actions, and your intentions. You will find insights by doing this as a mindful part of your life.
I don’t know why you are being downvoted. This is an excellent question. Personally, no, but that’s because I feel empathy towards other people and enjoy cooperation/community.
However, imagine if you were born without empathy or even enjoyed hurting others. Does that make you a bad person? Our society would certainly see it that way. You would be ostracized/incarcerated for not being the same as others because you enjoy hurting people. But does that make your existence wrong? I don’t think so. To be honest I don’t think there is such a thing as wrong and right, just selfish and selfless behaviors.
All this to say, I would say no and certainly don’t condone it, but if you ask someone else they may say yes. Who is to say that either one of us is right?
Thank you for this response!
there is infact good and bad actions. and there is a meaning to life.
But who defines them? If there is no god to determine that then that belief is entirely subjective. What one person views as good will be bad to another. How do you determine who is right?
there is god,the islamic one.
Well, I’m afraid that’s where we diverge in beliefs then. With a god it is perfectly reasonable to believe that, but without one it’s not.
i accept disagreement. we can agree to disagree or we can debate. whatever you want
Civilization and cooperation are intrinsic. The rules of human cooperation dictate rules of behaving. You do not require a god to establish murder and hording of resources and sexual violence as bad. They are defined as malum in sae for reason, in law.
Community sets the rules, adjudication, and punishment regardless of the inspiration of the rule. A god can provide a framework but people can do it too.
Ah…, the conundrums of subjective morality.
What’s your advice for younger folks? Nihilism!
I think Absurdism
If you take nihilism far enough, you loop back around to absurdism instead. And that’s where things go from “why bother? Nothing matters so what is the point” to “why not? Nothing matters so I might as well enjoy life.”
Optimistic Nihilism, is quite a good philosophical framework.
But I would recommend a mixture of optimistic nihilism and stoicism.
If nothing has any inherent meaning, the things you chose to be meaningful are as valid as any other choice.
Wear sunscreen
Learn how to micro dose acid, lift weights and eat right, don’t sell your soul to some corporation
Also trip a few times if your genetics agree with it. If they don’t, see if you can enter trances while meditating (it’s a special type of meditation). It’s good for you to feel one with humanity sometimes
Better yet: learn to microdose acid WHILE lifting weights.
Just don’t microdose while lifting
