Define “figure out.” I figured out I disliked being male by considering what I liked and disliked about myself. All the positives were more feminine or neutral, while all the negatives were masculine or masc coded. I decided on NB, but it still felt off. I didn’t want to be considered male, but I didn’t know if I wanted to be female.
For years I couldn’t parse my feelings when I imagined myself as a woman. I felt better, but I struggle with even identifying emotions, so it wasn’t clear enough to convince me. Eventually, I imagined myself as a mother: being pregnant, giving birth, raising a child that was my own. It felt so euphoric that I broke down crying because I knew I could never go back.
I still took another 5-6 months to start the process of coming out. I was still uncertain and terrified when I finally took the leap of faith. I was on death’s door mental health wise. I realized I could not carry on any longer as a man, yet it still took so much effort to make the best decision I’ve ever made.
It was night and day. I never thought I could be so happy or love life like that. It’s a miracle that I made it 23 years feeling like I wasn’t alive.
![egg_irl [Transfem meme]](https://files.botsin.space/media_attachments/files/112/559/575/432/621/092/original/38f97b473b27de89.jpg){kind=link}
How did you all figure this out for yourself? I mean, what made it click?
I knew something was up when a friend came out to me and I realised it was possible to be something other than your assigned gender.
5 years later, I’m reading an article about a non-binary person and bam, it all made sense.
Define “figure out.” I figured out I disliked being male by considering what I liked and disliked about myself. All the positives were more feminine or neutral, while all the negatives were masculine or masc coded. I decided on NB, but it still felt off. I didn’t want to be considered male, but I didn’t know if I wanted to be female.
For years I couldn’t parse my feelings when I imagined myself as a woman. I felt better, but I struggle with even identifying emotions, so it wasn’t clear enough to convince me. Eventually, I imagined myself as a mother: being pregnant, giving birth, raising a child that was my own. It felt so euphoric that I broke down crying because I knew I could never go back.
I still took another 5-6 months to start the process of coming out. I was still uncertain and terrified when I finally took the leap of faith. I was on death’s door mental health wise. I realized I could not carry on any longer as a man, yet it still took so much effort to make the best decision I’ve ever made.
It was night and day. I never thought I could be so happy or love life like that. It’s a miracle that I made it 23 years feeling like I wasn’t alive.