As you may know, I moved to using my blahaj.zone account almost exclusively, as I kinda disliked the vibe I was getting from .world. At the same time, I also want to gage the feelings people have about the migration. Will you continue to use 196 on lemmy.world? Are you happy with the change? I want to hear from you:
Something about 196 being on a non-queer instance feels wrong. I can’t explain it. Maybe it’s because there are a lot of queer-positive posts on 196? Not sure. Meh, whatever. I think I have a vague idea of why they’re moving away and quite honestly, if they want to bend to people wanting to stir shit, then maybe we’re better off without them.
(Iirc the gist of it is that there was a troll who claimed to be “dragon gender” or something (which included that drag’s pronouns were “drag”). Drag said a lot of nasty shit, stirred up drama, etc. People decided that was a good excuse to misgender drag and become the arbiters of what a “proper gender” is. People misgendering drag got banned, then got pissy and cried about it. In the meantime, drag was also banned at that point, it was mainly people stirring shit at that point. I’m pretty sure 196 is moving away from blähaj.zone because afaik Ada takes a zero tolerance stance on intentionally misgendering people; regardless of whether or not someone’s a troll.)
Quite honestly I’m kinda at the point where I’m considering quitting Lemmy entirely. Between the drama, doomposting, trolls and increase in general dickishness, it’s honestly getting really bad for my mental health.
Regarding 196: has it been different on Lemmy vs how it was on reddit? I’m on beehaw so I don’t see .world posts or communities, but at least on reddit I saw a bunch of edgy shit being posted when I still used the site a few years back
Regarding Dragon rider: drag uses drag/drag pronouns iirc and has expressed previously that they/them pronouns aren’t suitable for drag, so you may want to edit your wording just a tad. Still haven’t been able to figure out if drag is a troll or not, but as you say even if drag is a troll drag still has a right to identity. If Ada’s brilliant stance is why 196 moved, good riddance IMHO
Regarding your mental health: perhaps its worth blocking the communities or users that are bringing the majority of the drama/doomposting/etc? I absolutely empathise with the drain on mental health that can be, and I’ve been very very liberal with the block feature for exactly that reason. Its totally worthwhile to curate the space you inhabit online. I hope, whatever path forward you take, that you’re able to find yourself feeling better and better.
Tbh theres been some real nasty/sketchy crap from Drag (multiple account harassment), id lean towards troll myself.
Yeah thats fair. I only see what drag posts on instances I’m federated with/don’t have blocked, which I guess may be a small slice of the total
Dunno, didn’t really use it on reddit tbh. That’s why I associate it strongly with blahaj.zone.
Sigh You’re right, I fixed it. In my defense, I was actually trying to avoid directly referencing drag and drag’s pronouns not because I think drag is invalid but because I didn’t want to distract from the fact that people were intentionally misgendering drag because they believed drag’s gender/pronouns were invalid and that drag’s dickish behavior excused them from having to use drag’s pronouns. I was concerned that using drag’s neopronouns would cause people to have a knee-jerk reaction, which was why I was referring to drag as “the troll”.
Honestly, that’d kinda kill half the reason I use Lemmy: as a news aggregate. Furthermore, people here have too much time on their hands and find drama wherever they can. I used to think blåhaj.zone would be fairly free from drama in a generally leftist space; after all leftists should understand that queer instances and communities are generally best left to queer people, right? Yet that hasn’t stopped people from trying to start drama regarding the main queer instance.
Mm, totally see what you were going for with the pronouns. I think as soon as you mentioned “dragon” the ship had likely sailed for most of “suspension of knowledge of the individual in question”
I understand the dilemma regarding reducing the amount/variety of content you are served :/ to be honest, this is one of the main reasons I enjoy Beehaw so much, I used to be on a different instance and moved here because they federate with mostly high quality instances and the local content is of very high standard. The mods are also very good with cleaning up harmful or unsuitable content/posts/comments/users whilst not (to my mind) silencing differing opinions (when the opinions in question are not the aforementioned harmful content). I get my news feed, with much less… Mental drain
Do what is best for you, but it is my favourite social media. The best of the bad. Apart from random forums, the rest is just so infuriating to me.
Wait, this is over friggen redacted by Cracks???
my head hurts.
Edit: Not sure it’s wise or fair to call out the user specifically at this stage, so I removed that. If you read Mossy’s comment and have been on 196 for any amount of time, you’ll know. And it would be more about reactions to them, anyway.
Oh the people bent out of shape over it are relentless. They’ve been beating the wardrums since one of them got a timeout a while ago.
hey there, just weighing in. Neopronouns were not a factor in our decision. In addition, malicious misgendering has always been something that constitutes a removal or ban. this choice was in no way and attempt to reduce the queerness of 196
Random opinion: It would be wise to edit the post in LBZ 196, or make a new pinned comment, describing the rationale re: differences in moderation approaches more directly (at minimum, see the thread).
People are jumping right to other, less nuanced takes of the situation. I did too before digging deeper - the disagreements are subtler than what folks think they are right now.
I still think you and your team are making a mistake overall, but that’s beside the point. As you obviously know, people are pissed and the vague description doesn’t help at all.
Do with this as you will. Sincerely, best of luck - this is probably a rough time for you folks too, and I know you’re just people doing what you think is best.
Would you perhaps like to expand on that? Right now it appears hot on the tail of the dragon drama, which, considering from what I saw the majority of it revolved around people trying to misgender drag or ridicule drag’s identity, leads me to the conclusion that you didn’t like how Ada handled it and implies you yourselves believe that it’s alright to misgender someone if you believe their gender is just another troll.
Drag was banned for encouraging suicide and violence from trans people (multiple times), and for an egregious level of harassment of another user with alt accounts. We didn’t have any issues with their pronouns.
I believe the post Ada made was directed at the members of the community who were criticizing drag’s pronouns, but I think to a lot of people it came across as if she were addressing the ban. They simply had nothing to do with each other.
Respectfully, get bent