Hi, I’m a 21 year old guy and every time I’m outside for example to buy groceries I see so many good looking people (both female and male).
I don’t know what it is but they seem almost perfect, their faces are so beautiful and perfect, their clothes are so stylish and perfect, their hair and make up appearance looks so well groomed and beautiful. (I’m mainly referring to people around my age from Gen Z)
They’re all so confident and wear jewelry etc.
I don’t even have the knowledge how to dress good and stylish as I don’t have a feel for that. I just end up wearing what’s most comfortable for me like random sneakers, sweatpants/shorts and a polo shirt. But even if I was able to dress stylishly my face naturally still looks very average and not like all these other people.
I wonder why people look so perfect nowadays. When I look at old video tapes or pictures (like from the 1900’s) people seem to have looked way more average like me. Why could this be? Is the pressure from social media a reason because that’s why I’m purposefully not on there.
And honestly I also don’t feel like putting so much time and effort into my looks as I think this is only secondary in life and I mainly value human connections. Obviously I put some extra time into it for some occasions where I put on contact lenses, creams, a little make up (one that’s for men of course), hair gel/spray and perfume but even then I feel like I don’t look as good as many of these people I see on a regular basis.
Idk maybe it’s because people are more connected now and feel obligated to look nice? I don’t have your experience and I’m in your age range. At uni, I don’t see beautiful people all the time.
I’m older now and just about all younger people look beautiful (I guess that is a bias to some degree as well) yet so many of the young have self doubts, etc. Reminds me of the saying that ‘beauty is often lost on the young’. One of the reasons might also be that a lot have easier lives than others before them.
Idk as someone who looks like shit its because I have far too much social anxiety so I dont usually go outside, also you might just be extremely horny
That’s hormones and spring for you.
I live in rural America and can’t say I have the same experience as you do. I (34F) dress like a “bum” 99% of the time (T-Shirts, jeans/leggings, hair thrown in a bun) and thats how most of my busy friends dress too when they are not at work. However I do think if you live in a city or just a more populated area that its realistic to think you may end up on camera at any point during the day, and you want to look good for that, so you could feel compelled to try and always look your best.
Every once in a while, I do get full glam to go to the local grocery store because I really don’t go anywhere else, and I want a reason to “dress up” and I can imagine that there’s a lot of that going on too.
I live in a small town but in Germany. From hearing what you said about that rural place in America makes me wish to live there too. It would be so relieving to put looks secondary and see more people embracing comfort and not constantly stressing out about looks.
But from the videos I’ve seen online it looks like Americans often look even better than here in Germany with perfect white teeth and everything (even from videos recorded in grocery stores like Kroger and Walmart).
But like you said the factor of “dressing up” most likely plays a role here too.
Sometimes that’s regional. Are you located in Bavaria? I don’t know any German man that use makeup at all.
I very very very rarely use just a concealer because I have extremely dark under eye circles from very thin skin. I found it on Shark Tank where they showcased that male make up line. But I literally only use a microscopic amount to get rid of the worst darkening, that’s it.
But from the videos I’ve seen online it looks like Americans often look even better than here
Let me assure you that this is not the case. People of Walmart might be a better representation of much of the U.S.
Would people there (in the US) care if I don’t put much effort into my style and wear random sweatpants with a random (polo) shirt?
Anywhere you are, some will care some will not. This is part of how we filter one another out
Nobody outside of churches and expensive restaurants really care how you dress as long as the important bits are covered.
White teeth are commonplace with people that post videos and images of themselves online on a daily basis. I would hesitate to refer to any videos with an influencer vibe as being reflective of the average in North America.
There should be a name for this kind of bias. Influencer bias, celebrity bias? Something else?
Marketing.
It depends on where you are. I just drove thru a college campus the other day for the first time in years, and for it being one of the first really nice days, I have to say the student body was… Underwhelming
You’re obviously not from round here… (Gesturing vaguely at shuffling hordes of very plain people in my town. Self included. I fit right in.)
Seriously though, comparing yourself with strangers is a terrible idea. That said, if you do want to smarten up a bit, I’d suggest going to a menswear store and asking an assistant to assist. Explain your dilemma, ask them to help you put together one outfit, “smart casual” would be a good start. Good luck!
i never was in your situation. I live in France, and wherever I go, everyone looks like Quasimodo’s cousins
Really? I would’ve assumed the opposite, isn’t France the fashion center of the world?
They didn’t say they’re poorly dressed. Just ugly
You’re horny
Just saying other people look beautiful and better than me doesn’t mean I’m horny. This realization wasn’t meant on a sexual basis. But I guess nowadays people always take stuff like this the wrong way.
But the comment is still funny lmao
Yeah, it was 95% sarcasm. But don’t underestimate the evolutionary urge to procreate, it’s one of the most powerful forces on the planet.
My guess is you are down bad and bisexual. Rub one out and then check again.
What? I’m not bisexual. I can say a male looks good without being gay.
That would have been required for my theory, so I guess you deflated it.
You know to be honest, there are lots of people who are more laid back. People like slaying the day away but there’s no shame in putting less effort into your appearance, especially just for a grocery trip! :)
I consider my appearance to be armor. I put on makeup and cute clothes and style my hair so I can face the world. Helps my social anxiety.
Also, totally doesn’t take that much time. 20 minutes max once you get into the habit of it.
I don’t know you, but there’s a chance that someone else had this exact realization after seeing you
believe it or not, there is such a thing as looking “good enough” in any situation. spending this much time comparing yourself to everyone else-- you’re in for an exhausting life
