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I can’t help feel the use of the word gooner to replace wanker is the result of a very long winded practical joke by Tottenham fans.
Good lord pls can we get a CW or a NSFW blur on this motherfucker’s face /j
Fun fact: there’s a dent in his forehead you can see reflected in studio lighting sometimes. Allegedly, that dent is from the time Jeremy Clarkson punched him.
The word “gooning” being replaced to mean jerking it is doing irreparable harm to the bad guy union of goons.
If my a real wanker?
I thought gooning was when one takes wanking to a professional level.
Never mind gooning, I worry that the art of mooning is on the way out and will be lost.
wipe your… face!
Meanwhile the French are jacquing off
Why have I not read this sooner? My life is changed. This is genius. Banks hate it.
Like if your a REAL gooner
okmategooner
Get wankpilled. I’m on my tossing arc, Britmaxxing.
Now this is a sentence a Victorian child would understand.
You Philistines need to learn nuance
A cheeky wank is worlds apart from a thorough goon
smh
lol perfect caption delivery
Hmmmm, tough decision, while I like the word wanker, that wankers telling me to save it and if he’s telling me to do something, then it must be wrong.
“Wanking” and “Gooning” have vastly different meanings, in their context and nuance.
Gooning is really about the visual stimulation, the content being viewed. You goon at or to something.
Wanking on the other hand (or with the same hand perhaps) is purely about the physical act of grabbing your cock and jerking it.
Besides that, there are more subtle differences. Gooning implies prolonged and leisurely, for example, while wanking does not.
You’d never say you had a “quick goon,” but you could certainly say you had a “quick wank.”
So don’t worry, wanking isn’t dying out any time soon.
EDIT: Added a handy reference table
Activity Type Visual Stimulation Duration Gender Neutral Gooning Mental Required (Typically porn) Long Yes Wanking Physical Optional Long OR Short No (Requires penis) 
A handy reference, indeed.
The study of linguistics never ceases to fascinate me.
when you write your scientific paper about it, pls also include edging
How about hand jobs? Tit jobs? Fleshlights?
I’ve never heard anyone say “gooning”.
