Thanks! (I feel so dumb now lol)

Definitely wouldn’t be the first time I immediately jumped to scripting instead of finding an easier way to do something!

I fucking love this thank you so much

For me personally, I determined that it was in my best interest to be open-minded to maximize the number of potential partners.

I’m not going to go down the path of defining a million traits that my future partner should have because nobody in the world will match all of them. Instead, my goal is to minimize the number of preferences I have, while still being excited about a relationship with someone within the distribution defined by those preferences. So, for example, I don’t care what hobbies my partner has as long as we can make the relationship work. If we share hobbies, great! But if we don’t, that’s fine too. We can find other things to do together.

Even the fantasy I mentioned is likely not the full story, just a data point. I’m likely to be more flexible. There is probably no label that perfectly describes what I want my relationships to look like. While labels can help me find like-minded people, I also shouldn’t let them limit my thinking.

Also, I avoid thinking about aggregate numbers, e.g. “What percentage of people have these traits?” and instead think “Which settings and contexts maximize my odds of meeting someone like this?” It helps me recognize that I have agency to shift the odds in my favor and this isn’t a complete lottery.