Maybe a pature happened, but it was Rush Limbaugh getting raptured down to an even lower depth of hell.
They would not recognize Jesus anyway, expecting a white man wearing a toga and a cross, and carrying an American flag and an AR15.
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Uhhh, this would actually explain a lot right now…
But I think magic jesus definitely would’ve raptured up all the innocent kids and such.
So it’d be like what we’re seeing now with trump in charge, just with all the decent people gone.
But then again I don’t actually know how it would work, due to the simple fact that fairy tales aren’t real.
There are a few new missing persons reports on (what were) the last twelve remaining good people on the planet. The rest of us are down here jacking off in the bathroom with the fan on because parenthood has made it increasingly difficult (and way too risky) to do it in front of a computer.
Um, I was told all the Christians would be gone. I’m rooting for the rapture as hard as they are these days.
A lot of Christians according to Revelation won’t be raptured because they worship or support the antichrist… Sounds like MAGA to me.
Be the rapture you want to see in theno. Don’t do that.
I posted the same thing on mastodon yesterday.
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“You’re not going to heaven Why the fuck would you think I’d ever kick it with you? None of you are going to heaven There’s a trillion aliens cooler than you”
“From God’s Perspective” - Bo Burnham
This is probably in my top 3 favorite Bo songs , especially the latter bit:
You argue and you bicker and you fight
Atheists and Catholics, Jews and Hindus argue day and night
Over what they think is true
But no one entertains the thought that maybe God does not believe in you
You pray so badly for heaven
Knowing any day might be the day that you die
But maybe life on earth could be heaven
Doesn’t just the thought of it make it worth a try?
My love’s the type of thing that you have to earn
And when you earn it you won’t need it
I’m not gonna give you love just 'cause I know that you want me to
If you want love then the love’s gotta come from you
Even biblically speaking rapture isn’t real, at least rapture american protestants or specifically evangelicals think.
Neither was what they believe to be Hell until autocratic Rome, but look at 'em go.
Pretty sure heat death of the Sun will get us before Rapture happens. Then again they might think that’s Rapture event if humans still exist by that time.
I literally said this yesterday. Please stop eavesdropping
Well, Charlie Kirk got ruptured early.
God: “Hey Chuck, I’m taking you early.”
Charlie: “Gurgggglggglge,… flop.”
We would know. My dogs are still here.
Exactly. It’s not “all dogs go to heaven”, it’s “only dogs go to heaven.”
