My wife and I are both introverted. (and I have some social anxiety in certain situations)

We met on a dating site called “OurTime”. I can’t speak for it now, as that was 15 years ago, but it’s a site geared towards people 45 years and up, who don’t want to deal with the bullshit of other dating sites.
(neither of us were 45 at the time, but that didn’t seem to matter)

We have similar interests and that made it easy to start conversations. We talked back and forth for a week or two, and then started voice calls for about a week before actually going on a date.
We didn’t rush things along and just took things as they came, and got married about three years later.

We were in the same online friend group for many years. After a meetup in Europe she claimed me.

My wife and I met through Okcupid about fifteen years ago.

I had been in an insanely stupid long-distance relationship, called it off, and started looking for someone local.

The woman I broke things off with was younger than me and baby crazy, so I extended my age range by the same amount and met my wife quickly thereafter.

Specifically, we chatted for two or three weeks before I suggested we meet at a coffee place.

Two dates later we were exclusive.

She is seven years older than me and had never been in a serious relationship.

Just keep looking. Lonely people are absolutely everywhere, and you’re bound to find someone you just link up with eventually.

We met on Tinder of all places. It happens :) We vibed real quick, and now call each other love of our lives.

This might sound pedantic, but actually makes a big difference, mentally.

Introvert refers more to how you mentally recharge, rather than interactions. An introvert requires time alone to recharge, an extrovert needs time around people. Your more likely socially anxious, and possibly mentally underdeveloped for socialising.

By locking down where the problem actually is, it helps you figure out how to counter it. Social anxiety is quite common, with viable treatment methods. Social skills are learnt. You get them by practice. It’s a problem that is common for autistics, so the info from those corners of the internet could be helpful, even if you aren’t autistic.

Find a hobby you’re interested in if you don’t have one already. Find a group in your area that meets up to discuss or engage in that hobby in person. Make friends with the people in that group by just existing around them and talking about your shared interest. Maybe one of those friendships turns into a relationship, maybe not.

Don’t think of the people there as potential partners but as people you like spending time with and genuinely enjoy being around. If one of those friendships has mutual attraction and becomes a partnership, that’s great! If not, you’ll probably meet other people through them and maybe one of those will turn into a relationship.

Examples of hobbies for introverts that provide more structure for interaction and can have limited talking if needed:

• Boardgames / dueling card games like Netrunner / tabletop roleplaying games
• Pinball
• Video games fighting games or speed running communities are more widespread for in person events
• Book clubs
• Hiking, rolling skating, skateboarding, tennis, pickleball, basketball, soccer, bicycling, running, or swimming if you want to get some exercise

I got lucky on tinder and found a fellow introvert with near identical interests. I would not rely on that though, hobbies and friends are the best way to meet people, especially if you can make friends with extroverts that can be wingmen or do hobbies that involve a lot of one on one time like table top gaming or dancing. It takes at least a few years of active looking if you are well groomed and know what you’re looking for.

Met online through a hobby-oriented platform (not social media, not dating sites). Neither of us where actively looking for a partner at that time, so there was no pressure to perform, no expectations, everything just flowed (and if it hadn’t, that would’ve been OK too, at least at that point hehe). It took a bit over a year of one thing leading to another.

I’ve read some advice here that sort of matches that pattern, and by personal experience I’d say it works.

A person I had a fling with the winter prior introduced me to their friend in the hopes that she would toy with me and break my heart. We’ve been together ever since.

Meet someone during your hobbies? Don’t be afraid to just say hello to someone. Talk to a person you don’t find attractive as “target practice”. Be yourself and don’t worry about rejection. I got rejected probably 50-60 times. Each time it gets easier and most importantly…don’t give a fuck. Always someone else.

I went to and organised Reddit meetups. One of the people who went didn’t believe me that I’m Swedish (we were in Scotland and despite growing up in Wales I have an oddly posh English accent). She phoned her Swedish friend to catch me out, which didn’t work, much to her chagrin. Said friend demanded a photo of me as payment. We started talking a little while later and it became immediately apparent that we were a perfect match. We’ve been together for thirteen years.

Don’t go to things to meet a partner, but to build the connections that might bring you into contact with people that might be interested. In the meantime you’ll have fun (hopefully), improve your social skills, and generally avoid dying alone.

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My wife is an introvert. It took 7 years of very innocent twice a year meeting at camp and someone else shoving us together for us to think about becoming an item. Been married for 8 years now (together for 13). Sometimes these things just happen. Top tip is not to try too hard.

Dungeons & Dragons.

33 years ago, we really just collided, there is no other way to describe it.

I was in the US Army and stationed at the same hospital she worked at, she brought a patient consult to my office. Two weeks later we started fucking, four months later we got married.