- cross-posted to:
- kemper_loves_you@lemmy.dbzer0.com
- cross-posted to:
- kemper_loves_you@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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The application let’s you send flowers to your “dasher’s” hospital room
Taking about dystopian.
We don’t care about that motherfucker that damn near killed himself and inconvenienced us, but hey, that’s why we do the gig thing so we don’t have to insure them! But hey, YOU totally should send him flowers!
There is an artist around who spoofs the big app interfaces to make these even worse thought experiments. I’m guessing it’s one of his or hers. Unfortunately I don’t remember the name / handle.
Here I found him, Soren.
https://sorens.beehiiv.com/p/doordash-accident-order-recovery
This one’s a little real for any fellow Americans who are self-employed (or have mucked up their taxes and owe a bunch)
https://sorens.beehiiv.com/p/irs-direct-pay-taxes-with-organs
the dasher delivering your flowers to the previous dasher’s hospital room, has gotten into an accident
I wonder what % of people seeing this think it’s real? People really gotta keep an eye on the community and understand what shitposting means
Regardless of if it’s real or not. I wouldn’t even fucking bat one eye at doordash for doing something like this.
But no one using doordash would ever go and actually collect the item to confirm if it’s real anyways so it’s moot.
I mean, I saw the community, yet I had to think of it.
It’s “nottheonion” adjacent.
Grim
I’m not going outside in this weather. Especially if I have to put pants on. They should just send a second driver to pull my Arby’s out of the burning wreckage and finish the delivery without me having to tell them.
The last time I used doordash Uber eats whatever was 2019 and one day it was raining hard so I went outside to meet the delivery person at their car and they thanked me 😄
“Oh my god is he ok?”
“Yes your food is 50% ok!”
It’s a trap. Like in the famous documentary, ‘The Santa Clause’, if you examine the crash site the drivers body will disappear and YOU will become the Door Dasher, and be required to fulfill all of their commitments.
I hate capitalism.
“your Dasher has died in a collision but here’s a pin drop in the chance you can collect your order from the wreckage”
nO tIp No TrIp 😂
Needs instructions for in person pickup.
“Your dasher wears a medical bracelet identifying his next of kin. To expedite access to the crime scene to retrieve your order (1x bagel bites, 4x lubricant and 1x grain alcohol) dash++ members can unlock this name to then pose as a direct relation when authorities ask.”
“sEnD fLoWeRs tO yOuR dAsHeR’s hOsPiTaL rOoM” 💀
If I wanted to go outside in the freezing cold I wouldn’t have ordered out, jackdash.
I actually had this happen once. Dasher got in an accident
The app just showed his car going in circles around the point he crashed
Probably hit a fairground carousel
