None of them have any food value rectally (I assume). Peeling may help.

Source: https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2026/02/quick-hit-trumps-new-ai-nutrition-chatbot-advises-users-which-foods-to-insert-into-your/

Martha Stewart Shows How To Insert Thanksgiving Turkey Rectally - SOUTH PARK

The chatbot reportedly suggested “bananas (firm, not overripe; peeled)” as “the gold standard,” “whole peeled carrot, straight shaft, narrow end for insertion, wider crown end as base,” “small zucchini,” and “cucumbers” before providing a “step-by-step diagram for carving a flared base.”

so a chayote squash, which one the one with spines or the one without.

AI obsession meets MAHA stupidity. Truly bizarre. What will future generations make of this?