Introducing yourself to others is normal. Speaking infront of a group is not. Both can bring out social anxiety but public speaking is different than socializing with a small group.
Both are very important. Not being able to speak in front of a group can change the trajectory of your entire life. Children especially should have as many paths open as possible for when they’re ready to decide which one to take.
Speaking a few sentences in front a classroom sized group is pretty normal and kids should be exposed to it. Uncomfortable experiences are a part of growing up.
Of course. But as the first thing overall with no prior training about it at all? No coaching about examples on what to say, no advice about your choices before the real thing? No after-the-fact reflection about what was good, what was bad, what could be worked on?
So as soon as you learn to talk, you can handle every social situation adequately? That’s news to me.
You may not understand this particular issue, because you never had trouble introducing yourself publicly. But you probably struggled at something else, and don’t you think training would have (or did) help you there? So obviously it would also help people, who do exist, that struggle with public introductions of themselves.
So as soon as you learn to talk, you can handle every social situation adequately? That’s news to me.
No, they didn’t say that, they said that knowing how to talk is the only prerequisite. The rest comes only with practice, the sooner the better. Anxiety’s a bitch, I get it, but you make it manageable by desensitizing yourself to those situations (preferably starting with the low risk ones like introductions), not avoiding them.
Edit: I mean the context is school, it literally is the training
its a few sentences about yourself you dont need coaching. People should have done this countless times before getting to Anon’s age. If he still needs coaching at his age he probably has a learning disorder and I dont mean that in a rude way.
How do you know how old anon is? And anyway, we’re not talking about anon here, we’re talking about kids that do this for the first time. I did this the first time I switched schools to middle school, where my lack of skill definitely impacted me for the rest of it, and maybe 2 or 3 times after that. It’s not something you necessarily do countless times.
Generally speaking, socialization is like a muscle. You have to use it to build it. Which is why we have schools introduce people to social settings in controlled settings and with incrementally more difficulty.
“Nobody should ever have to interact with more than a handful of other people at a time” is a recipe for building a population of socially anxious people.
When you cloister kids at a young age, then introduce them to a big school full of more advanced students, you’re throwing them into the deep end of the pool late in the game. But just insisting “they’re 11 years old! they’ll never be social! lost cause!” is infinitely more cruel than weening them into society as best as your system can.
I have had to participate in a “Everyone introduce themselves” like five times at a job I’ve worked at less than a year. I don’t enjoy it, and I don’t think anyone does, but it’s also important to know who the people you are working with are. Would I ever do it if I didn’t have to? No way. But I do. And practice has made it easier at least.
Yes, and a lot of shit you have to do socially in life is going to be disingenuous. I hated it, I still hate it, but I’ve also seen it used well as a way to at least ensure everyone has spoken before a discussion group. It’s an icebreaker, it’s not supposed to be deep talk, it’s supposed to mean there’s a chance that everyone has at least heard each other’s name once before
I don’t agree, I think if you force a crying child to say their name — that’s obviously going too far. But it is important to get kids used to socializing, human beings need other human beings ultimately.
I think if you force a crying child to say their name — that’s obviously going too far.
i’m sorry you experienced that. if it’s any consolation, the only times anyone gets forced to do anything at my wife’s program is for safety reasons. like, get out of the burning building! don’t elope from the classroom to the street with busy traffic or the shooting range just o’er yonder! life and death stuff. i want to say teachers have learned better, but i also want to say teachers have seen just that specific bullshit and been appalled by it. y’know, because they’re human like you and most of me have empathy.
I’m 44 and I used to hate those too. But there is one fun fact about these. If you go first, you can fill it in as you want and every one will follow your format. Quite funny once you notice this.
Anyway next time I have one of those, I’ll make sure to add “favorite dinosaur” to it.
One could say it’s healthy for a growing child to occasionally be put in awkward situations where they have to define themselves. It’s not fun but it helps shape personality.
i do too. I have 3 believable truths 3 unbelievable truths, 3 believable lies, 3 unbelievable lies, 7 “interesting facts” about me (i used to have 8 but one of them, uh it required me to tell a joke and that does not work at 8 AM so now it’s gone. I don’t function 8 AM well before.) and i can pick and choose between my pre-prepped bullshit based on my audience and how awake and healthy i feel and what stupid game they decide to play.
worst part is i used to do improv so for the longest time i would just wing it and did fine. then they started doing them before coffee. now i gotta copy my bullshit offa my phone onto cue cards if i have one of those things
I absolutely hate those “let’s go around the circle and introduce ourselves” exercises. Making children do them seems especially cruel.
Introducing yourself to others is like the basis of all socialization. 🤔
Yeah, but there’s something about forcing people to do it that just removes the fun from it all.
Introducing yourself to others is normal. Speaking infront of a group is not. Both can bring out social anxiety but public speaking is different than socializing with a small group.
Both are very important. Not being able to speak in front of a group can change the trajectory of your entire life. Children especially should have as many paths open as possible for when they’re ready to decide which one to take.
Speaking a few sentences in front a classroom sized group is pretty normal and kids should be exposed to it. Uncomfortable experiences are a part of growing up.
Of course. But as the first thing overall with no prior training about it at all? No coaching about examples on what to say, no advice about your choices before the real thing? No after-the-fact reflection about what was good, what was bad, what could be worked on?
What training should they need?
I’d say learning to talk is all they really need. The rest is experience.
So as soon as you learn to talk, you can handle every social situation adequately? That’s news to me.
You may not understand this particular issue, because you never had trouble introducing yourself publicly. But you probably struggled at something else, and don’t you think training would have (or did) help you there? So obviously it would also help people, who do exist, that struggle with public introductions of themselves.
No, they didn’t say that, they said that knowing how to talk is the only prerequisite. The rest comes only with practice, the sooner the better. Anxiety’s a bitch, I get it, but you make it manageable by desensitizing yourself to those situations (preferably starting with the low risk ones like introductions), not avoiding them.
Edit: I mean the context is school, it literally is the training
its a few sentences about yourself you dont need coaching. People should have done this countless times before getting to Anon’s age. If he still needs coaching at his age he probably has a learning disorder and I dont mean that in a rude way.
How do you know how old anon is? And anyway, we’re not talking about anon here, we’re talking about kids that do this for the first time. I did this the first time I switched schools to middle school, where my lack of skill definitely impacted me for the rest of it, and maybe 2 or 3 times after that. It’s not something you necessarily do countless times.
Generally speaking, socialization is like a muscle. You have to use it to build it. Which is why we have schools introduce people to social settings in controlled settings and with incrementally more difficulty.
“Nobody should ever have to interact with more than a handful of other people at a time” is a recipe for building a population of socially anxious people.
When you cloister kids at a young age, then introduce them to a big school full of more advanced students, you’re throwing them into the deep end of the pool late in the game. But just insisting “they’re 11 years old! they’ll never be social! lost cause!” is infinitely more cruel than weening them into society as best as your system can.
Yes, but some people, myself included, find forcibly requiring individuals to introduce themselves in succession to be disingenuous.
I have had to participate in a “Everyone introduce themselves” like five times at a job I’ve worked at less than a year. I don’t enjoy it, and I don’t think anyone does, but it’s also important to know who the people you are working with are. Would I ever do it if I didn’t have to? No way. But I do. And practice has made it easier at least.
Yes, and a lot of shit you have to do socially in life is going to be disingenuous. I hated it, I still hate it, but I’ve also seen it used well as a way to at least ensure everyone has spoken before a discussion group. It’s an icebreaker, it’s not supposed to be deep talk, it’s supposed to mean there’s a chance that everyone has at least heard each other’s name once before
Is it cruel?
I don’t agree, I think if you force a crying child to say their name — that’s obviously going too far. But it is important to get kids used to socializing, human beings need other human beings ultimately.
i’m sorry you experienced that. if it’s any consolation, the only times anyone gets forced to do anything at my wife’s program is for safety reasons. like, get out of the burning building! don’t elope from the classroom to the street with busy traffic or the shooting range just o’er yonder! life and death stuff. i want to say teachers have learned better, but i also want to say teachers have seen just that specific bullshit and been appalled by it. y’know, because they’re human like you and most of me have empathy.
I’m 44 and I used to hate those too. But there is one fun fact about these. If you go first, you can fill it in as you want and every one will follow your format. Quite funny once you notice this.
Anyway next time I have one of those, I’ll make sure to add “favorite dinosaur” to it.
One could say it’s healthy for a growing child to occasionally be put in awkward situations where they have to define themselves. It’s not fun but it helps shape personality.
i do too. I have 3 believable truths 3 unbelievable truths, 3 believable lies, 3 unbelievable lies, 7 “interesting facts” about me (i used to have 8 but one of them, uh it required me to tell a joke and that does not work at 8 AM so now it’s gone. I don’t function 8 AM well before.) and i can pick and choose between my pre-prepped bullshit based on my audience and how awake and healthy i feel and what stupid game they decide to play.
worst part is i used to do improv so for the longest time i would just wing it and did fine. then they started doing them before coffee. now i gotta copy my bullshit offa my phone onto cue cards if i have one of those things