Sure, there are always outliers and you can correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s just the overall impression I have.

(I wasn’t sure if !asklemmy@lemmy.world or this community would fit better for this kind of question, but I assume it fits here.)

  • TimeSquirrel@kbin.melroy.org
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    16 days ago

    I’m here because I DON’T want to have to read fucked up opinions. People here are mostly nice compared to mainstream platforms.

    I’m all for difference of opinion, but not when one of those opinions is “we should oppress LGBT people” for example. 10-15 years ago, I’d have been more receptive to discussing opposing opinions, but shit has changed. A lot of those opposing opinions are now simply unacceptable to even entertain, because they’ve become a real, actual threat to my well-being. People aren’t discussing tax policy anymore, they are discussing imposing states of emergency to do some kind of purge on undesirables.

    Some people call it an echo chamber, I just call it chilling and having fun with like-minded people. There’s nothing wrong with that. That’s what forums have always been.

    • cRazi_man@lemm.ee
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      16 days ago

      People here are mostly nice compared to mainstream platforms.

      Try disagreeing with the hive mind. Anyone can be nice to someone who echo’s their own opinion. The real niceness of a person is revealed when they can show civility to people they disagree with (I’m not talking about LGBTQ oppressors or Nazis…there’s a huge spectrum of opinions that aren’t extreme).

      • The Snark Urge@lemmy.world
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        16 days ago

        I don’t know. I am still as opinionated and difficult as I ever was on Reddit, but I also turn it around, display civility, and cede points far more often here. Maybe I’m becoming better, but I think it’s just a better situation overall.

        • TheFonz@lemmy.world
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          15 days ago

          I’ve received way more bitter and raged out responses here than I’ve ever received on Reddit for very lukewarm vanilla takes. I’m not saying Lemmy is full of extremists but there is a user base here that is all or nothing. My guess is it’s age related though.

          • OpenStars@piefed.social
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            15 days ago

            Overall the people here are nicer.

            The extremes are higher though - some people were booted from Reddit for a reason, and they came here.

            • TheFonz@lemmy.world
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              15 days ago

              Yea. I agree. There is a nice median and really strong extremes. But those extremes sometimes hog up the convo.

              • OpenStars@piefed.social
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                13 days ago

                The presence of the high end of the extreme is what blew me away though. On Reddit I had given up all hope bc it never happened (even from myself, as I kept becoming more defensive, more snarky but less kind) while here the fact that it sometimes, heck even often happens, is just… outstanding!:-) 😍

                Also the low end of the extreme is concentrated into specific instances, such that blocking Lemmygrad.ml and hexbear.net will improve someone’s experience on the Fediverse by ~90%, and then blocking users from lemmy.ml (with the PieFed Lemmy alternative, or either the Sync or Connect Lemmy apps, or lemmy.cafe, dubvee.org, or quokk.au at the instance admin level) improves by a further 90% I found.

                So the structure of the curve matters greatly here, to someone’s quality of experiences in the Fediverse.:-)

        • supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz
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          16 days ago

          The version of someone you invite in the door determines the initial trajectory of how that person will act in the community. You can invite in the leading edge of someone’s developing kindness or invite in the ossifying mass of their nature that is threatening to turn hateful and uncaring. No one instance of invitation to a new person (however that may happen, formally or informally) pushes the needle far either way within any one particular person (though sometimes it can radically do so) but the overall integrated effect is a moderate shift of the an entire community towards the better or worse version of the community members. When this effect is used for good people often describe the resulting community space as a community that accepts them for who they are or more succintly is a genuinely safe space.

          Of course, every interaction is in an invitation in some small way, it doesn’t just happen once.

    • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
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      16 days ago

      Yeah, I don’t think anyone would ask you “Are you okay with sitting at the bar with nazis?” yet plenty will happily judge you for saying “I’d rather not have to deal with MAGAts and their opinions”

      Sorry but if your opinion is “trans people aren’t people” or “blacks need to know their place” then your opinion is shit and no the fuck I don’t have to listen to it

      • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        14 days ago

        But another question, “are you ok with sitting at the bar with nazis, but they’re wearing red shirts with a hammer and sickle on them and espousing the same propensity for murder?”

        Lemmy is fine with murder and genocide so long as you wear the right shirt while doing it.

        Source: .ml, grad, hexbear.

      • LovableSidekick@lemmy.world
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        10 days ago

        I agree, which is why I recently kicked a MAGA guy out of my D&D group that meets at my house. I had tolerated him up to then because he generally acted decent and was a good player. But after the election I decided I just don’t feel like extending my hospitality to that anymore.

        But on the flip side when I hear a phrase like, “uncomfortable with trans people” my first reaction is, “What makes you uncomfortable?” instead of, “Fuck you you fucking bigoted fuck!” For that moral imperfection in my character I’ve received name-calling and at least one ban. Whatever. People have irrational fears and I’m not going to exile them to the desert because their “eww” reflex isn’t pristine.

        • trevor@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          15 days ago

          Nah. Tankies are wrong, but they’re also powerless. Conservatives actually have power though, and are extremely dangerous.

          • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            14 days ago

            An idea being “bad” is power agnostic. If I want to blow up orphanages, wanting to do so is bad whether I’m the president or a homeless dude, the ability to follow through may change with power, but the ability to follow through isn’t what makes “wanting to blow up orphanages” bad, the idea itself is bad.