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I always end up checking the fridge, just on the off-chance I left it in there while getting food.
This has been the case, more than once.
Recently, my mom and I looked EVERYWHERE for her favorite cane, and couldn’t find it. We took a break to clean up the kitchen, and I opened the fridge to put stuff away, and found her cane hanging from the high shelf on the door. She’d hung it there when she needed both hands to shift stuff around.
Also, the TV remote, multiple times.
Also, that’s a good way to remember to take your lunch to work in the morning. Get it ready the night before, and put it in the fridge with your car keys on it. The next morning, when you can’t find your keys, you’ll eventually remember that you put them in the fridge with your lunch.
I put my car keys on anything I don’t want to forget; one of the best pieces of advice I’ve learned. Can’t leave the house without them, and it immediately triggers my memory of where they are because I never put them anywhere else without purpose
The opposite also happens to me frequently, I distinctly remember storing it somewhere really smart, so I wouldn’t lose it. If only I could remember where…
Worst case of this was traveling solo and finding this really cool hidden pocket in my backpack that fit my passport exactly.
Two weeks later, I was certain I found a great place for it and nearly missed my plane looking for it.
Fuck, I did this with a DisplayPort cable a few months ago and I have zero fucking clue where it ended up. I had to resort to HDMI for my new ultrawide, and because HDMI is lame, it only supports 1440p@100Hz. DisplayPort supports 1440p@180Hz.
After looking in all the regular places and not finding it anywhere, I just ordered another cable.
I did this with a remote.
Immediately found the old one the day the new one arrived. In the same place I’d been looking for weeks…
Love how the HDMI forum restricts it on Linux so you can’t use its full bandwidth
Fucking stupid.
Fucking proprietary capitalist standards.
I always think “it wasn’t a good idea to leave it there”. Two days later I remember thinking that I left it somewhere I thought it wasn’t a good idea so I can automatically dismiss the places I usually leave things.
In my house, the tagline is “I put it in a safe place.”
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I hate how accurate this is
I was looking for my drill driver the other day and I distinctly remember myself thinking “good luck finding this future me, you asshole.” It was in the back of my wife’s car for some reason.
Or that you stashed it deliberately at “the proper place to find it easily”. The result is the same.
Not me! If put something in the proper place it is so out of the ordinary that I’m waiting to need it again.
Then after you give up and get a replacement, you get the same thought to put it somewhere and now you have n + 1 of the item. Rinse and repeat.
The most powerful banishing spell is “let me just put this somewhere I know I’ll remember it”
The most powerful summoning spell is purchasing its replacement
That’s why I don’t keep a lot of stuff.
Otherwise, I could never stop buying new stuff.
And you can summon an image of the thing so clearly in a location your brain is convinced it must have been recently.
It was 5 years ago
I have this but also can see the image of the thing so clearly in a place where it’s NEVER even been before
Me, yesterday: “I shouldn’t put that booklet with the discounts to show at the checkout in the back pocket of my jeans, it’ll fall out and I’ll be in trouble.”
Me: do it anyway.
Me, at the checkout: “Fuck, I lost the booklet”
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Okay wait… Is this strictly an ADHD thing? I do this all the fucking time. Like, I go through this mind palace thing where I hunt down my every single action with that object and play “Where’s the stupid place I left my wallet this time?” In my brain.
But I don’t see where I put the wallet, just places I’ve been with the wallet until I’m in the right place and my brain clicks. Like walking through a doorway and remembering what I was going to do.
Most things you read about mental disorders and even illnesses are in all of us in very small portions, but it gets diagnosed as a condition when it starts to inescapably condition your life. To hit a modern definition of a disorder, you (or rather a psychiatrist) need to confidently tick several boxes.
I’d recomend to read about ADHD, people’s stories and lifehacks that can be useful anyway, without jumping to assumptions just yet.
Well, I do have a diagnosis. I appreciate you providing the insightful take on the process though. I just thought this was another instance of me just being forgetful.
Hard to de-condition myself from thinking about myself in a neurotypical fashion and recognise my limitations are real.
Hehe, I didn’t get it from your comment.
I can’t say a strong yes since I’m not a professional, but it’s common to me too. Thinking about that from a programming perspective, we all have short-term memory (e.g. RAM in PCs) where we write tasks, things, impressions we need now. It’s limited in volume\blocks, so when we push one another thing in, it takes something else’s place, and past things inevitably gets overwritten, unless they went the long-time memory road. What’s left are traces and parts beyond recovery, usually a saved meta log of your thoughts\intentions, some unique emotions and visions, or something that you saved in another sources (e.g. you interlink where you lost your keys by remembering what other thing you did at the moment). You comb these together and construct either a list of timestamps or a blurry 3d scene in motion of significant actions and details, and work from here.
It is, as I know, natural to everyone. It becomes an ADHD thing when inputs are that frequent you don’t stop overwriting important stuff with first, second, third thing you now focused on, or try to reactualize lucky survivors by writing all your memory with them.
I haven’t thought much about that when my life was slow and boring, but as it got to it’s speeds now, the rhytm I’m actually thrive in intellectually, losing things or forgetting stuff becomes too much apparent, compared to my more NT colleagues.
Take it as my own personal perspective and nothing else.
That’s not what this is about, i. e. it’s not about retracing your steps. That’s common for everyone.
It’s about remembering the feeling you had when you stashed the item away, often knowing, at that moment, that the place you picked is woefully inadequate for storing this particular object, all while being fully aware that your mind will not be able to make the connection later on and you will end up searching for the object, with none of your usual coping mechanisms suitable to guide you.
That particular feeling is then recalled later in a moment of despair, often when the need to retrieve the item is greatest, and accompanied by a certain, ironic amusement looking at the events that led you there, with no one to blame but yourself.
Yeah… That’s just about the feelings and experiences I tend to have.
“I am definitely going to remember putting this here.”
Narrator: “He forgot almost immediately.”
My mantra is the opposite; “I’ll never find this again”, and then a day or two later; chuckles, “Called it!”
I legitimately love those moments, where you have a very solid memory of how the place you left the object made you feel, and have to try to dig up any more information about it or about any items you might have left the object nearby. It’s like a murder mystery but you also find loads of fun things you haven’t touched in months or years along the way! Massively frustrating if you need something in a hurry, though.
Exactly this. So many of my memories are tied to feelings which is absolutely fantastic for remembering that I’ve been to a place, but not for remembering where that place is, for example.
When I say “I feel like I’ve been here before” I really mean that the feeling itself is familiar.
And its the same when I put stuff away. I remember where tools are because I remember the feeling I had when I put it away and not because I remember the location specifically. It’s a real double edged sword because I can remember very specific details way clearer than most people but I can’t remember generic broad things like “where did you put it”
I am excited to find out that I am not alone!
My wife can remember where we were, what we were wearing, and what the conversation was, to seemingly everything we’ve ever done. (She can actually play recent conversations back in her head.)
Meanwhile, I just remember impressions. They can be pretty visceral too. A smell, a sound, and the emotional response that I had to a place.
But name, location, decor… not a chance.
But I think I have some form of aphantasia too, since I have a terrible time seeing any details in my head.
