We had awful chalk-based bread growing up.
But always Welch’s Grape Juice, since we were Methodist. Charles Welch invented pasteurized grape juice specifically for his Methodist congregation to have an alcohol-free communion wine.
In the case of the bready Jeebus story above, I believe they used Sqwelch’s Grape Preserves for the filling. 😜
Presbyterian in my youth, same story, croutons and Welsh’s. Loved the tiny, fluted shot glasses! Heavy bottoms, carried in 2-layer wood platters, bottom lined with green felt. Just checked my wife’s monster shot glass collection, only one similar, way bigger.
Funny enough, I checked last night to see if the church was still around. I think it is? Hard to tell. I should write, tell them I grew up there and beg for a shot glass. Ya know, for “religious” reasons.
My church was on the other side of town, “across the tracks” so to speak. Nothing but old people and two kids my age. There was a nice Methodist church down our street, tons of kids, plenty of cute girls, but no was couldn’t go there. :(
Bland wafer Catholic checking in. You would think ritual cannibalism would be a bit spicier.
We can defy our doctrine when it benefits us
All the gays gotta die tho that’s what the rules say
At least she didn’t add figs to that bread mix… Jesus would’ve come down personally to smite that woman.
!cropbot
bleep, bloop
adding an extra reply to tumblr screenshots is the equivalent of a laughtrack
wow thanks cropbot
Oyster crackers and Welch’s grape juice, checking in, Jesus tasting MIGHTY fine.
No u snuck into the refrigerator and stole Jesus’ blood (unless that little room had cameras!?)
Oyster crackers?! 😂 Did you just take one tiny cracker each communion?
“This is my body, this is my blood. OK, body’s kinda small, on a budget here people.”
Who complains about whole grain bread?
I’m American, so not having anything to eat for an entire hour is hard. I welcome the hearty nutrious bolus of whole grain host.
bolus
Nice. 🤌🏼
Not enough sugar so it differs too much from factory produced white bread for the US-American tongue.
Two in one shampoo and conditioner with jesus reminded me of that time our town had christian-themed sushi bar and its name was - you guessed it - JESUSHI! Wonder why they went out of business so fast…
The church i went to growing up taught that it’s supposed to be unleavened bread, meaning it has no yeast. I’m not sure if that’s strictly biblical or not though. It represented that Jesus was without sin. I guess yeast is evil or something lol.
Maybe they’re mad because yeast doesn’t need 3 days to make bread rise
Are tortillas unleavened?
They should have just went with calling it Intinction
This post is a little raisin of giggles in the bread of dour frustrations that is the rest of my Lemmy feed.
Reminds me of the bread jesus incident.
Amazing
Hail Satan!
Now, if only we could get a Satan with pornstar abs like ol’ cruci-Christ.
Hale Satan, indeed.
Frankly, I’d say that a “sanctified” cleansing combo product like that should be called “Blood of the Lamb”, and I can almost hear the psalm-y infomercial now…
Relive the “forgot to eat and you want more” moment:
https://www.amazon.com/Altar-Bread-White-Design-Communion/dp/B0FKCJ68PJ?
