• Etterra@discuss.online
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    1 month ago

    Not me, I intend to have a heart attack and fucking die by 50 if I’m lucky, 60 of I’m not.

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I’m planning an Elvis. Toxic megacolon burst while I’m eating a sandwich on the shitter. I’ve almost got the timing down

        • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          While eating a peanut butter and banana and marshmallow and pickle sandwich, with toxic megacolon, which burst and also gave him the heart attack and then he died

      • Etterra@discuss.online
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        1 month ago

        Woo, that’s a tricky combo to pull off. Make sure your achievement is put on your tombstone for that one.

        • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          “their colon mega’d so much toxic I thought I’d died ve gone to the state fair”

          I’m workshopping my epitaph. Originally it was going to be “what’s that smell? It’s me again” but you’re right, an Elvis needs to be commemorated

          • D_C@sh.itjust.works
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            1 month ago

            Tricky. Would you go for an almost clickbaity, “He pulled an Elvis” on your tombstone? I mean, not everyone knows how Elvis died. It’ll get people thinking for decades to come

            Or more detailed like “Toxic megacolon burst whilst eating a sandwich on the shitter” type thing? Not as clickbaity, but it’ll still get people thinking…

            • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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              1 month ago

              if i set up a camera and youtubed it, and then QR coded below “As Elvis Went, So Did He” so they could watch my heart explode as i failed to shat myself to death as many times as i want?

              • D_C@sh.itjust.works
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                1 month ago

                You’d make millions and millions from all the views.
                Well, not you exactly, but still it’ll be good content. It could be the RickRoll of the future!!