Genuinely can’t figure out how other people develop active social lives. The most common advice I get is to look on Meetup, but I found pretty much one group and while I had fun, halfway through the event they started making fun of liberals for not having friends. I’m genderqueer so that ain’t gonna work out. Everything else on Meetup is scientology garbage.
I go out and do things on my own and try to be open to people who approach me, but on the rare occasion someone wants to talk to me it’s because they’re horny and they’ve mistaken me for a straight woman. I can be out in the mud picking up litter and someone will strike up a conversation about the environment, something I’m interested in, and it turns out it’s because they think I’m doing this to get the D.
I’m getting crazy bored. Does everyone just work a 9-5 and then go home alone? Except for when they have sex with the occasional random straight man??
Picking up litter is good - thank you. Also thanks for asking the question. I think a lot of people may be just home alone and not like Kevin.
Find an activity. Softball, soccer, whatever. Grown adults get together to play kickball.
Doesn’t matter if you aren’t good at it, people like to help teach newbies.
Volleyball and pickleball have robust adult communities in most places. And you don’t even have to be good! The point is usually to mingle and drink.
Does everyone just work a 9-5 and then go home alone?
It seems like it, since the pandemic, with “alone” meaning to an existing spouse in some cases. Although I am talking more about a shifting along the spectrum than a hard rule.
Hopefully others here will have some actual advice that may help, but in the meantime if it helps to hear a quick response then here is some meta-commentary.:-)
I think most people are just waiting for things to return to “normal”. So like until a few months the people were waiting to see who would win the election - remember there were calls for a literal, bloody, violent upheaval of all society (though none of us were quite sure how seriously we needed to pay attention to those?).
And now we’re past the “election” so waiting to see what happens next. Like, are you going to be okay presenting as not-… well… conservative? Should we all buy MAGA hats to wear, if doing so will save our lives, or would we rather accept whatever comes our way regardless?
Read books. Watch TV. Stay alive and safe. And yeah, find friends when you can:-). You’ve got the right idea I think - hobbies, maybe take a class, perhaps do an improv, just keep looking for what may work. You got this.:-) You may be alone, but that’s what you share in common with us all… together? :-P
I imagine it’s easier in cities. I’m lucky i already have friends, living in a dying little town like mine leaves you with nowhere to hang out at, let alone meet new people.
Im older and married so I have more aquantances than friends now but most of my friends come from activities and hobbies. I live in a major metro area though so like there are groups that get together and pick up litter in a park and you can pretty much choose any activity and there is some group doing it. Like I could join a maker space which has both tech people and crafty people and such.
