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The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Funny: Home of the Haha@lemmy.world · 1 年前

Be unstoppable.

lemmy.world

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Be unstoppable.

lemmy.world

The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Funny: Home of the Haha@lemmy.world · 1 年前
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  • itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml
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    1 年前

    If marriage isn’t annoying your spouse with your nonsense on a daily basis then I dont know what marriage is.

    • shalafi@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      My wife is nearly annoy proof. If I texted that, she would get all warm and fuzzy.

      • jballs@sh.itjust.works
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        1 年前

        Sounds like your wife is keeping the Live, Laugh, Love pillow manufacturers in business.

        • don@lemm.ee
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          1 年前

          “Why fit in when you’re born to stand out?”

          • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
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            1 年前

            Baaaaaaby ruuuuuuuth~~~

            • nomous@lemmy.world
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              1 年前

              It doesn’t matter what comes, fresh goes better in life!

              • Chekhovs_Gun@lemmy.world
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                1 年前

                I feel like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight!

                • jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org
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                  10 个月前

                  deleted by creator

      • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        1 年前

        Have you tried removing the toilet seat 1 hour after your wife goes to bed, so that when she gets up to pee at 2am and doesn’t turn on the light, she falls in?

        Then you burst in, snap a pic, and upload it to your instagram with the caption “I keep the bitches pussy wet!”

        Maybe THAT will annoy her?

        • Laborer3652@reddthat.com
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          1 年前

          deleted by creator

          • piccolo@ani.social
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            1 年前

            deleted by creator

          • WillFord27@lemmy.world
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            1 年前

            Don’t think they were being serious

            • Laborer3652@reddthat.com
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              • 0xD@infosec.pub
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                1 年前

                What? You don’t love cutting their hair while they’re sleeping?

      • lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca
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        1 年前

        Well we cant have that, of course. You need to try some new tactics.

    • verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works
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      1 年前

      Texting my spouse in another country with random nonsense, even though with our data plan, it’s $0.10 a text.

      • Kalkaline @leminal.space
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        1 年前

        Can’t you use something like Telegram/Signal/WhatsApp and avoid the charges?

        • Neon 🏳️‍🌈🇺🇦🇪🇺🏳️‍⚧️🇹🇼🇮🇱🏳️‍🌈@lemmy.world
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          1 年前

          Signal. Whatsapp maybe. But Telegram isn’t even encrypted e2e. Never Telegram.

          • BlueMagma@sh.itjust.works
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            1 年前

            Wait… whaat ?? There are actual people who knowingly prefer WhatsApp to telegram ? I truly prefer telegram to WhatsApp, and am very surprised about this. To me WhatsApp = Facebook and I cannot fathom to use it if I can avoid it.

            • OhNoMoreLemmy@lemmy.ml
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              1 年前

              To be clear they’re both shit from a privacy perspective.

              Telegram has effectively no security by default. WhatsApp has better security on paper with meaningful end to end encryption. But Facebook still get your meta data and they scan images in the chat to check for illegal data.

              That said I basically agree with you for insecure conversations. Telegram might have access to more of my data in a chat but they don’t connect it up with all of the data Facebook has tracking me across the internet.

              • Kaput@lemmy.world
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                1 年前

                Pssst hey kids … nextcloud.com. You wanna score some privacy?

                Warning it may lead to Linux and other Foss addictions.

          • piccolo@ani.social
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            • Neon 🏳️‍🌈🇺🇦🇪🇺🏳️‍⚧️🇹🇼🇮🇱🏳️‍🌈@lemmy.world
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              1 年前

              Yeah, in secret chats. Where you lose all the features why people use Telegram over other messengers.

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    • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works
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      1 年前

      I literally promised an eye-roll per day in my vows. Can’t stop, won’t stop.

      (Holiday inn)

    • ccunning@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      I should have married you instead of my wife. She’s just not that into it…

    • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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      1 年前

      hey Donna…

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