Were just going to ignore that Bryce Dallas Howard is just there, apparently immortal or something?
Actually, that’s Patricia Tallman. I went to highschool with her son.
It was a joke dude. Dear lord
Data is doing a concern.
Don’t worry, the ship is into it.
It may be the Enterprise-D, but it’s more into the A
Naw. Actually he died in that one so… okay so don’t hate me, but he must be in a time loop scenario here!
I’d be more worried that the panel is running plasma though it. Plasma that often violently explodes when the ship takes damage. He really trusts those panels with his butt.
Nah, it’s on the bridge… that panel is loaded to the max with rocks and fireworks.
I hope the screen was locked
looks down at the screen
“YOU HAVE ENTERED YOUR PASSWORD INCORRECTLY TOO MANY TIMES. CONTACT TECHNICAL SUPPORT.”
You have incorrectly entered your password too many times. This station is locked for 137 hours.
This incident will be reported
ohhhh please don’t report me sudo I’ll do ANYTHING
My bum is on the console, my bum is on the console. Look at me my bum is on the console.
“Number one, asspedoes, FULL SPREAD”
Ass pedos? Geez
Sir! firing sequence has been interrupted by a CORN (Cessium Ordinance Radiating Nucleons) … we’re going to have to increase power to push this one out!!!
I think you meant Number 2
Beavis: “Number One, I order you to take a number two.”
“Who do you work for, Number 2!?”
O’Brien, transport all of our ship’s sewage to their bridge.
Noooo! Then what will they eat for the rest of the week!? 😯🤢🤮🤪
Unrelated anecdote:
Years ago I had a cheap Blackberry lookalike phone. It had a button lock feature to prevent butt dialing, but some bright spark decided that the lock wouldn’t apply to the ‘9’ and ‘1’ keys, presumably so that a user could dial 9-1-1 even if too panicked to unlock the keypad. Which just meant that it was really easy to butt dial 9-1-1…
Had something similar, except that the code on the phone to dial 911 with the keys locked was #08. Keys were so sensitive I couldn’t keep my phone in my pocket, had to live in my bag or it’d be dialling emergency services.
Insufficient data. Please provide additional samples of each scenario.
I… I really hate to be that guy, but… “phasers”.
Thank you. If it weren’t for you I’d be “that guy”.
Ahem.
Now, if he took off his pants…that’d be a different story.
i’m sure if we have palm rejection worked out in tablets, ass cheek rejection is absolutely future table-screen tech
That works until the first species joins Star Fleet that types with their butts.
The Asstralians: Everything about them is upside down.
Upside down and ass-backwards
There was a TNG episode that established that controls would only respond to authorized inputs, presumably from whatever limbs, organs, or phalanges any crewmember might typically use for such purposes.
They meet an alien species who controls all their electronics and touch sensitive systems using a single long appendage attached to their groin.
The Na’avi?
Nah, other way around, that’s a long groin attached to their appendage (braid).
There’s the episode in VOY where Tuvok loses his memories and when he’s touring his station on the bridge accidentally activates a photon torpedo.
Somebody on the security team got demoted that day
Also ensign Kim, but that’s because Janeway saw him first.
One would hope that stupid fashion of touch screens on dangerous vehicles stops before the 24th century…
It’s not a fashion choice. It’s a versatility choice.
Suffice to say touchscreens give better feedback than today, as I’ve seen characters on Star Trek use those things blinded sometimes.
They’re also much smarter than our ones. One episode had a kid worried about doing exactly the thing shown in the meme, where he’d fallen, caught himself on the control panel, and thought everyone had died as a result of him fat-fingering buttons.
He was reassured by Riker telling him it’s impossible, because computer consoles can detect that, and have authorisation codes, so won’t trigger the buttons otherwise.
Plus, there’s aliens who have no eyes, and presumably cannot see in Starfleet. It would be unfair to them if they can’t use anything except by voice controls.
If I cannot operate a computer with my ass by the 24th century, I’m putting us all in a time loop until someone does something about that.
