Truck Driving for me. It’ll feel cool for probably a half-hour for me, to be driving something big. Until my worry of having to meet things in timely manners start kicking in and my anxiety to make sure information going all directions are right enough for easy deliveries.
Not to mention, how stupid easy it probably is for a eighteen wheeler truck to topple over in bad weather.
I could never do most medical care jobs. About the only thing I could do is work in the pharmacy, and even then they sometimes have to give people vaccinations. I might be able to do that but that’s still pushing my general squeamishness.
ICE.
Simple one? Waiter, my uncle has been working on it since he was a 14yo and he’s fucked up health wise. I don’t want that for me
Phlebotomy.
Blood makes me queasy
I think any purely manual, highly repetitive job would kill me. Like assembly line work.
I worked as a dishwasher in a small restaurant as a teenager. Those 2 4-hour shifts felt like they lasted DAYS.
Having done a few weeks of highly repetitive work, the worst was when I had to bundle items in groups of 10. I couldn’t think a thought more complex, that repeating song lyrics to myself. When I got a few hours feeding a machine that counted for itself, it was liberating.
I’ve never driven a really big truck but a 24 foot U-haul isn’t that big a deal. It’s weird at first but you get used to it.
Any job that involves moving around in four dimensions. I can’t imagine that at all.
Since someone already said HR: Middle management. I don’t want to be making life changing decisions for other people at the behest of what someone else thinks shareholders want.
Law enforcement. I was already in law enforcement and I’ll never do it again. It felt like I was a babysitter for idiots: breaking up fights, handling drunk people, de-escalating domestic issues, etc. Working on the border is shit, too. I’d never want to be in a situation where I have to deal with migrants at the behest of the government.
Off shore rigs/commercial fishing
I like the ocean but I think I might go insane there
I watched a video about UNDER WATER oil drilling (or something like that, not sure if I got the terminology correct), and like they talk about how workers have to go in a fucking submarine and then they have to live in a tiny living space under water and also they need to spend 8 hours to slowly depressurize before they can resurface…
Nah, fucking caustrophobia is gonna kill me.
Doctor
I hate gore-y stuff eww
But since I’m East Asian in a western country, I remember when I was in K-12 school, I get a lot of “Are you gonna be a Doctor?” comments and I’m just like… 🫠
Probably never gonna be a politician…
I hate to have every embarassing moment in my past get disected by the opposition
Also fuck public speaking, cuz I know someone is gonna clip it and replay any gaffles
Absolutely. I’d go further and say a surgeon. Cutting in to living folk and hoping you do a good enough job to literally keep them alive. That’s wild.
Stand up comedian.
Hi! Local comedian here! I can help field this.
Every time I do a show, I go in with the intention of being funnier and more interesting than what people are scrolling through. Usually but not always, I succeed. What makes this challenging is that all my shows are in the same venue every single time, on a regular schedule, which means I have regular audience members. I can’t let them down, so I get really prolific really fast. More material than Ricky Gervais, Jerry Seinfeld, Louis CK, and every other goddamn hack under the sun, at the same fucking time (good comics excepted—shoutouts to Randy Feltface, James Acaster, and more). Most of it gets tested in my corporate call center day job, which gets me decent CSAT ratings.
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I did comedy as a day job instead of a night job. Would I enjoy telling the exact same show to a lot of different venues? Fuck no. Wouldn’t laugh at my own shit half as much.
A bartender or barista. Just the thought of having to know how to instantly make an untold number of drinks, with infinite variations and customizations, and get it fucking perfect every single time fills me with dread.
If you do a job like that, please know that I consider you a wizard.
I have my own espresso machine and make various drinks for myself as a hobby. That’s actually the easy part of being a barista. The hard part is keeping up with a high pace of orders during rush hour. I would not want to be a barista either, specifically because of the stress of that work.
The other commenter is right about the good coffee though. Making really good espresso from fancy light roasted single origin coffee is extremely difficult.
Most baristas are terrible at making good coffee. There are some coffee shops around that make good coffee but they’re definitely in the minority.
Depends on where you are but this is true for many places in the States.
I wouldn’t be able to work in sales, marketing, or any client-facing corporate role since I find those interactions very draining and dislike having to negotiate or push people into something they aren’t already at least a little bit receptive to, especially if I don’t fully support that thing myself.
Same, that’s why I’m a truck driver
I have changed jobs a few times because the position I was in transformed into a sales based position.
Yeah, same too.
I hate the fuck out of advertising and marketing. There’s no way I’d last even an hour, having someone tell me to go out and get people to buy products. Products and services that might not have been very well worth the money, but it has to be someone’s job to convince another to buy it anyways. You become the very thing you absolutely loathe.
Same, that’s why I’m a mechanic.
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