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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Greentext@sh.itjust.worksEnglish · 3 months ago

Anon takes up microdosing

slrpnk.net

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Anon takes up microdosing

slrpnk.net

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Greentext@sh.itjust.worksEnglish · 3 months ago
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  • PanArab@lemm.ee
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    3 months ago

    Why is the nurse still on Qt 3.14?

    • Coconut1233@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Technical debt; qt update in not a business priority and therefore not included in the KPIs

    • Etterra@discuss.online
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      3 months ago

      Because she’s not a full gallon.

    • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      He should get her number to help her update. She’d probably be grateful.

    • Nalivai@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      It was the last one that was pure c++, before they started playing around with all this QML stuff

  • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org
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    3 months ago

    Reminds me of this:

    • Rayquetzalcoatl@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      God that’s so fucking awesome lol, what a hero

      • Acinonyx@lemmy.sdf.org
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        3 months ago

        *an hero

        • FreshLight@sh.itjust.works
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          3 months ago

          Haha no

        • redfellow@sopuli.xyz
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          3 months ago

          The fuck, man?

      • Etterra@discuss.online
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        3 months ago

        He’d get faster results from eating really old watches.

        • meowMix2525@lemm.ee
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          3 months ago

          Nah he’d probably just lose all his teeth and bones if he did that

    • isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de
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      3 months ago

      remember to guarnish the pizza in red 40

    • ameancow@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Imagine his embarrassment when the charcoal just neutralizes all the toxic mountain dew and energy drinks in his guts, his ulcers heal, digestion improves and he feels better with more energy and then decides to go out and take up surfing, where he meets a nice girl on the beach and they hit it off and eventually get married and raise a bunch of kids, then BAM outta nowhere, 27 years later, hit by a truck.

      • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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        3 months ago

        A tale as old as time

      • isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de
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        3 months ago

  • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    He took this old skeptic joke and ran with it.

    • Manifish_Destiny@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      I thought this meme was made because of this post? I’ve certainly seen an older greentext of the same shit.

      • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        I saw it pre-gamergate (pre-elevatorgate even)) in skeptic groups, making fun of “immune strenghtening exercises”, meaning you expose yourself to germs on purpose and it was supposed to boost your immune system in the long run, not needing vaccines at all.

        • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          Vaccines are immune strengthening exercises …

  • IndescribablySad@threads.net@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    Anon just moved too quickly. Avoid impatience when you’re doing important work like this, or else you’ll squander months of effort.

  • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    What is QT3.14?

    • darcranium123@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Cutie pie

      • Allero@lemmy.today
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        3 months ago

        This one answer is serious and true, just heads up.

    • SalmiakDragon@feddit.nu
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      3 months ago

      Cutie Pi

      • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Wauw

    • vrighter@discuss.tchncs.de
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      3 months ago

      3.14 is pi

      • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        3.14% of sailors are pi-rates

      • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Actually it’s 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841971693993751058209749445923078164062862089986280348253421170679821480865132823066470938446095505822317253594081284811174502841027019385211055596446229489549303819644288109756659334461284756482337867831652712019091456485669234603486104543266482133936072602491412737245870066063155881748815209209628292540917153643678925903600113305305488204665213841469519415116094330572703657595919530921861173819326117931051185480744623799627495673518857527248912279381830119491298336733624406566430860213949463952247371907021798609437027705392171762931767523846748184676694051320005681271452635608277857713427577896091736371787214684409012249534301465495853710507922796892589235420199561121290219608640344181598136297747713099605187072113499999983729780499510597317328160963185950244594553469083026425223082533446850352619311881710100031378387528865875332083814206171776691473035982534904287554687311595628638823537875937519577818577805321712268066130019278766111959092164201989 and continuing

        • Frostbeard@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          I would love for someone to check and see if you deliberately changed one digit to fuck with us

          • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            Nah, I would never!

            Or would I…

            Nah, nah, of course not…

            Right?

            Right?

        • vrighter@discuss.tchncs.de
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          3 months ago

          eh, it’s close enough. I only know up to 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375 by heart.

          • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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            3 months ago

            I know it all the way to the end but it takes forever to write it out.

        • Etterra@discuss.online
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          3 months ago

          You missed the sixth 3.

          • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            My mom always said I was a failure

    • parricc@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      QuickTime 3.14. it’s a really old media player from 1998. Unfortunately, I don’t think version 3.14 specifically ever actually came out. We’ll never really know what it would have been able to do because 4.0 came out instead. So I can see the appeal for him. Trying to use a 27 year old outdated media player that doesn’t actually exist is a lot like repeatedly shooting yourself in the leg.

    • MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml
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      3 months ago

      deleted by creator

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      About 1.15e/4 gallons. Its a common volume in the united states.

  • MrSulu@lemmy.ml
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    3 months ago

    Darwin was right

  • hypnicjerk@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    “The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.”

    getting outraged over this nonsense says so much more about you than it does about OOP having a giggle.

    • drspawndisaster@sh.itjust.works
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      I think the top picture is a banana with brown spots on it. And the bottom picture has the most obscene lighting I’ve ever seen.

  • Sylvartas@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 months ago

    Fake : OP had some skin condition and took some pic of his leg, then just took a pic of the same leg wrapped up in something

    Gay : OP admits to getting penetrated

  • arc@lemm.ee
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    3 months ago

    What an idiot. Everyone knows you can make yourself invulnerable to bullets with blessed magic amulets available on the internet.

  • Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf
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    You’re supposed to shoot yourself in the foot.

  • red_bull_of_juarez@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 months ago

    These glimpses into the world of the stupid and mentally ill are as fascinating as they are disturbing.

    • MDCCCLV@lemmy.ca
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      Wouldn’t you feel like a fool if’n this guy figured out the secret and was out there taking 50 cal rounds to the face.

      • Lord Wiggle@lemmy.world
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        I think he doesn’t need a 50cal round to the face as his brain is already damaged enough.

        • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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          If you take a 50 cal round to the face and walk away from it with only brain damage, you should enter the lottery

          • isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de
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            Phineas Gage would disagree

    • Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works
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      3 months ago

      Bro, did you not hear? One of the nurses was a QT3.14, he didn’t get her digits, and she probably thinks he’s highly regarded, but he saw her. Surely that counts for something

      • aeshna_cyanea@lemm.ee
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        3 months ago

        he’s just like me fr

      • Etterra@discuss.online
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        3 months ago

        She’s in Canada, you wouldn’t know her.

      • DontTreadOnBigfoot@lemmy.world
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        she thinks he’s highly regtarded

        • GreatRam@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          That’s the joke

          • Smee@poeng.link
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            3 months ago

            Regards

  • Kowowow@lemmy.ca
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    I wonder what skin would be comparable to if it was even bullet resistant, I’m guessing rhino hide would be the closest real world thing

    • kamenLady.@lemmy.world
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      or a croc

      Edit:

      The Bulletproof List

      Edit 2:

      But, now seriously - the only bulletproof animal is Roger, the Kangaroo

      He just needs to look at the Bullet, for it to fly straight back to the barrel

      • AtariDump@lemmy.world
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        I think Roger just stole my girl by looking at her.

        • DeltaWingDragon@sh.itjust.works
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          Roger doesn’t do push ups, he pushes the earth down

    • Drz@feddit.uk
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      There was the karmadillo story https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-33748027

  • psycho_driver@lemmy.world
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    This is why democracy is doomed to failure.

    • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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      what’s the alternative? I’m actually curious

      • Retrograde@lemmy.world
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        Dictatorship, duh

      • leftytighty@slrpnk.net
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        I guess nobody’s heard of anarchy

      • thermal_shock@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        The D or the D, you pick

      • MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml
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        A good education system with good funding.

        • lud@lemm.ee
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          3 months ago

          Education is an alternative to democracy?

          • douglasg14b@lemmy.world
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            Either you don’t get it or you’re being intentionally obtuse.

            Education is kind of required for a democracy to function effectively in this new age of global communication. Where previously every village had an idiot, now every idiot has a village, And without good education and good critical thinking, this is an expanding and compounding problem.

            As such, democracy is doomed and societies that are spiraling will continue to spiral until whatever else forms, forms

            I’m guessing some sort of dystopian oligarchy, since society’s in this state seem to be incapable of not handing over land wealth, power and decision-making control to just a few wealthy individuals.

            • lud@lemm.ee
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              Someone asked what the alternative to democracy was. They answered “education”.

      • untakenusername@sh.itjust.works
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        algocracy could work, having tons of automated systems in the decision making process.

        doesnt have to be ai, and there could be people involved too, but more machines isnt a bad idea

        • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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          Dangerous people are identified as a young age and are placed in a virtual reality where they can do no harm and live out their narcissists fantasies, and we don’t have to deal with them.

          • isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de
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            how do you define dangerous? what’s the cut off point? is stealing a water bottle from a homeless person the same as tealing it from walmart? same item technically

            • Lka1988@sh.itjust.works
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              IMO its not about the item, but the intent. I know we’re getting into hypotheticals and rhetoricals, but IMO, the line is doing anything that causes harm to another living being without feeling remorse.

              Stealing a water bottle from a megacorp doesn’t harm anybody. Stealing a water bottle from a homeless person can mean life or death.

            • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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              You’re way too overthinking this.

    • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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      Democracy? We don’t directly vote to choose our own way through life. We elect “representatives”.

  • FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world
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    I wonder what crayon flavor is his favorite

    • Sweetpeaches69@lemmy.world
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      He has a strong career in the Marines in his future, for sure.

    • sfled@lemm.ee
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      Crayola has many colors but lead isn’t one of them.

      • DeathsEmbrace@lemm.ee
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        I’m drinking leaded glue.

      • Etterra@discuss.online
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        3 months ago

    • SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml
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      Strawberry

      • Sonicdemon86@lemmy.world
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        Is that the red or pink one?

  • DaddleDew@lemmy.world
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    They don’t dig the bullets out usually because it causes more damage for no reason. Stop believing everything you read someone say on 4chan.

    • red_bull_of_juarez@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Sure, but it could just as well have been dangerous to leave in. You must have serious issues to post on 4chan, so I’d say this story is at least plausible.

    • Aggravationstation@feddit.uk
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      It’s likely artificial and homosexual.

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