• NottaLottaOcelot@lemmy.caEnglish
    614·
    3 days ago

    Sounds like Emily doesn’t like waking up to fresh baked pizza for lunch from her loving father in a house large enough to have a yard you can build a pizza oven in. Poor Emily, she must live a really difficult life.

            • Insolentjellyfish@lemmy.world
              6·
              2 days ago

              Howdy, In case you are asking out of genuine curiosity, yes! That can be a real problem for two reasons that immediately come to mind. Firstly, the average vagina is only as deep as the average penis, so a penis that is too long can cause pain durring thrusting for both parties. This is less of an issue with anuses since they do not strictly have an end. There is still such a thing as too deep though, medically. Girth can similarly be an issue since vaginas and anuses are stretchy, but only to a point. Secondly, humans do not have a bone in the penis to help it stay up. They rely almost exclusively on blood pressure. If the penis is too big, it can be very difficult to get an erection, once again making it a problem for all involved sexual parties. Cheers!

    • Yankee_Self_Loader@lemmy.world
      171·
      3 days ago

      This is basically what I say to my wife when I get an idea like this and the result of said idea will only benefit her. Her response is almost always something to the effect of “well ok hang on”. Lady, I know you well enough to know the things you like. Let me help you

      And guess who loves the pizza I make for her in the pizza oven, the fresh baked sourdough bread I bake for her, the tomatoes from the garden I dug, the beer I brew, the pasta I make, and the deer meat I shoot? What a terrible life she has

      • Pronell@lemmy.world
        101·
        3 days ago

        My wife has learned by now that I follow through.

        She won a gift certificate to a kitchen store and I asked for, and reluctantly got, a cast iron pan.

        Dozens of delicious pizzas (and other stuff) later she just buys me kitchen stuff she thinks I can use.

        • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
          4·
          2 days ago

          I feel you. We have fantastic cookware. We almost never use it. Why? I don’t know how many years ago, I told my wife i wanted to buy a cast iron pan so sorry i know the budget’s tight but i’m spending some date money. three date nights later, she told me we needed another cast iron pan.

          • Pronell@lemmy.world
            2·
            2 days ago

            We now have two cast iron skillets and a cast iron bread pan, which was used on the last loaf I posted. (It has a top so you get the full extra crust)

            I love cooking for her.

            • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
              2·
              2 days ago

              we’ve got the 14 and the 12 skillets, a 6 quart dutch oven and a large ramekin (we call it the artichoke dish dip because that is the only thing i make in it)

              food is my love language, so cooking with my wife is one of my favorite things

    • some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world
      4·
      2 days ago

      You joke, but my very Catholic grandmother will say things like that as a workaround to avoid blaspheming.

      Although it’s never been clear exactly which gods she’s been referring to all my life - maybe I should ask her.

  • mrbn@lemmy.ca
    10·
    3 days ago

    Hey Emily, can you introduce me to you dad so he and I can become friends?

  • Etterra@discuss.onlineEnglish
    123·
    2 days ago

    As midlife crisis hobbies go that’s a pretty good one. I wish my dad had built a pizza oven when I was a teenager. I’d suggest that her stupid makeup was ruining her brain but honestly a teenager is dumb anyway so…

    Source: I was a dumb teenager once too.

    • v_krishna@lemmy.mlEnglish
      27·
      3 days ago

      Long ago I had a girlfriend who had a neighbor who built one in his backyard and would have at least monthly (weather permitting) block parties where he’d provide the dough and the oven and everybody else would bring sauces, cheeses, toppings, etc. Great way to bring people together and freaking delicious.

    • SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
      3·
      2 days ago

      It’s because making actual great pizza is super fucking hard and 99% of RESTAURANTS can’t even do it properly, let alone great. Making great pizza is an artform that requires a shit ton of control and balance over like a hundred variables.

      Most people just want cheap and easy pizza at home, not a multi-generational, obsessive hobby that requires deep scientific knowledge and data tracking that’s basically a universally devalued trade.

      • exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        9·
        2 days ago

        People need to get off the idea that only doing things perfectly is worth doing.

        No, making even mediocre pizza is still worth doing, because even mediocre pizza with an oblong shape and lumpy topping distribution can be pretty great when it’s still hot and crispy and you’re having fun making it.

        I have a pizza oven. I make a lot of pizza at home, and I eat a lot of pizza out at restaurants. I enjoy it even when I know it’s not perfect. Because pizza is fun and even bad pizza is good in its own way.

    • caboose2006@lemmy.world
      31·
      2 days ago

      My wife and I are very frugal. And we love to cook. And we love pizza. We make pretty good pizza with just our pizza stone and our shitty oven. I can tell you right now, if we had a pizza oven, we’d be using it twice a week, because that’s about how often we have pizza. I’ve developed a habit of making dough when I’ve had a stressful day. It’s healthier than drinking. Just knead that dough.

    • AxExRx@lemmy.world
      5·
      3 days ago

      20 years ago my friend asked me to help him build. It sat in his yard and we fired it up probably once a month th 7 months of the year for around 5 years. Then we pulled it out of the ground, cut the base short, and mounted it onto a trailer. It went to another friend’s house, where it sat for a couple years and cracked. Maybe got used 2x. ~5 years ago, we got it back in good shape, now with a coat of cement over the bricks, and used it for another friends wedding, ended up selling it to another friend who had a catering buisness, and now it does 3 days a week at the brewery

    • Pencilnoob@lemmy.worldEnglish
      71·
      3 days ago

      I built one with just clay and straw, used it every weekend for years, it cracked, rebuilt it, used for another two years, cracked again, rebuilt it a third time. I’ve moved to a new house and already miss it. Even if I’m not making pizza, it’s great just for an outdoor fire while sitting in the hammock. It’s contained and uses like 1/4 of the wood while not being as dangerous.

      A great way to spend a weekend afternoon is to fire it up and loaf on the hammock. I’d also use it to bake bread, make peach cobblers in cast iron, and smoke bacon. Great times. Maybe I could get the parts to rebuild it this weekend…

    • Stupidmanager@lemmy.worldEnglish
      5·
      3 days ago

      I bought an indoor unit, used it nearly 3x a month for 4 people over 10 years. It was fun as we all made our own and then I coked them, At least until my kids grew up and moved out. I would have loved an outdoor unit, wood fired had that amazing smoked taste to it and I’ve gone to parties at a friends who had one he put together “and used twice”. Effort for 90 seconds of cooking was just not worth it, but when cooking for 15 people he loved when I’d come over and light it up. It really was the journey for him.

      Now I’m in Spain and single, I’d do it for me but the effort of planning just 1 pizza never appeals to me more than just getting out and seeing people at my local pizza place.