Edit: of course this is satire. The power of the reading comprehension devil grows stronger every day 😢

  • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    2 months ago

    You’d think the people living in this ‘walkable’ neighbourhood would end up starving and being underweight … when in fact they all just end up overweight with diabetes and heart disease

  • nadram@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Not a strong example of walkable communities, it’s quite pathetic in fact. Is this satire?

      • ToastedCoconuts@piefed.blahaj.zone
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        2 months ago

        Sidewalks and 15-25mph speed limits go a long way. Would be nice if there was little community stores for staples embedded in the neighborhood, but that’s a foreign concept in American suburbs

        • TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works
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          2 months ago

          I was just talking about this with my wife yesterday. It would be so nice if there was a small market in our suburban neighborhood

          • snooggums@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            It isn’t there because of zoning practices separating living areas from businesses, which is often decided at the local level. Just gotta convince all your neighbors that they should be good with it too…

            • InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              Be sure to add side walks with it. My childhood neighborhood now has a little strip mall with some snack shops. They are nice, but no safe way to walk to it. Short walk, but still.

    • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 months ago

      This is … imo, not satire.

      It is simply an example of the opposite of a walkable neighborhood/community, literally framed at such an angle as to capture the ludicrousness of it.

      It is an illustration of the absurdity of car-brained NA city design.

      But it isn’t exaggerated.

      These kinds of developments, neighborhoods, are absolutely everywhere in the US, they are very common.

      Even the use of ‘walkable’ may noy be satire: If there are sidewalks the whole way, well that would actually be uncommon, and many US policy makers and local city urban planners would actually, seriously, class this as walkable.

      I am guessing folks from more civilized parts of the world are reading this as satire, because this seems unfathomably, beyond belief stupid.

      … Welcome to America, we hate it here.

    • Laurel Raven@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      2 months ago

      I can’t think of any reason someone would post this without a hint of irony, but nowadays it’s impossible to tell for sure

      • WhatAmLemmy@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        If it’s not satire, America has apparently regressed to a median state of “mentally challenged”.

        • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          2 months ago

          I’m gonna have to keep saying this until it becomes common knowledge:

          Yes.

          You are basically correct, yes.

          ~30% of adult Americans are functionally illiterate, 2nd grade or worse reading/writing/vocabulary skills.

          The mean, average American has between a 5th and 6th grade literacy level.

          Despite the fact that almost 40% of US Adults have a Bachelor’s Degree or better… less than 10% can critically compare and contrast multiple news articles about the same topic.

          We are very, very stupid, compared to any country with anywhere near the same GDP per capita.

          • Lv_InSaNe_vL@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            ~30% of Americans are functionality illiterate, 2nd grade or worse reading level.

            First of all, you’re a little high. It’s only ~21% of Americans who are functionally illiterate. Source

            Second, the thing people forget about that statistic is it’s more or less in line with European countries like Germany, England. And we have better literacy rates than countries like Ireland, France, or Spain. Source

  • shneancy@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    hi European here!

    what the fuck?

    i’m here complaining how it’s hard to walk to a big shopping mall or an ikea and you’re out there without even a small grocery store around most corners? how do you lot do that? i’d seriously just starve to death if i couldn’t get up, walk for 5min, and buy food for a whole meal (or a frozen pizza)

    • qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website
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      2 months ago

      This does exist in major US cities, especially the older (by US standards) ones. I’m in San Francisco, in a “good” neighborhood, and restaurants, groceries, bars, and multiple forms of public transit are all a short walk away. This is very different in car centric suburbs/cities though.

      • MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.works
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        2 months ago

        The contrast between eg Manhattan and Los Angeles is wild. First time in LA I went out walking, looking for a restaurant. The footpath vanished and suddenly I was on the edge of what seemed like a freeway. Relatives in Santa Monica were horrified to learn that I had taken a bus from my hotel downtown to visit them (it was perfectly fine).

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      As an American I need you to understand that what you’re saying sounds like a deep parody here. We have some major cities that are comfortable to live in without a car, but they’re few and far between.

      To us a grocery store is a place you go to rather than swing by real quick. Its changing in some cities, and I’ve even lived in a suburb with walkable groceries, but its really not the norm.

      • shneancy@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        o_ o

        i have no words honestly. i wasn’t even talking about cities, so far all European cities i’ve visited were walkable, i was thinking mid size towns and even villages. Basically if your place of residence can’t be missed if you blink as you drive by there’s probably at least a grocery store in it, and more frequent a general store with most basics you’d need in a day-to-day life next to groceries

    • frank@sopuli.xyz
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      2 months ago

      I live in the EU but used to live in the US. In a nice part, too!

      I lived like 400m from a small store. Never drove once. Insanely dangerous to walk on such a busy road with no sidewalks, no crossings, etc.

      I walk a ton and bike ~80-100km/week now and don’t think twice about it.

      • stinerman@midwest.social
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        2 months ago

        In a way that can’t really be described to Europeans. If you live in a suburban area, people think you’re weird if you do anything other than use your car to get anywhere for any reason. Almost everywhere in the US is designed around the idea that you have a car and you use it every day.

        This is about my city:

        [full article]

        And it’s absolutely true. Our buses are mostly useful for driving to a Park & Ride/Transit Center and then to work and back. That’s about it.

        • Dasus@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          Now depending on context from how old that post is, it’s really saying something.

        • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          Oh yeah I can confirk Columbus is a fucking nightmare for bus transit. Its kinda bikable in some parts, and by that I mean possibly safer than Kyiv. But I’ll say this about it, its definitely better than a lot of other places in America. I will never understand its resistance to light rail.

          There are parts of America that are reasonable. Cities like New York, D.C., and Seattle have people who can afford a car choosing not to own one. But then you’ve got places like Houston and most small cities where even Columbus looks walkable.

    • huppakee@feddit.nl
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      2 months ago

      They all want to live in a detached single home (is that how you call it?), so not enough density for a store to make profit. Glad I don’t live there tbh.

      • aesthelete@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Single family home is the common term here.

        I’m starting to think I need one myself because Americans are generally such loud fucking wankers that you need both a detached house and yards to get any peace.

        Another thing is that the US is so car brained that nearly all attached homes (even townhouses in the city) have a garage somewhere. In my current condo, there’s alleyways with garages that face each other. The amount of fucking noise coming from the garage alleys make it impossible to sleep for lighter sleepers.

        • huppakee@feddit.nl
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          2 months ago

          Probably doesn’t help that a lot is wood and panels, instead of brick or concrete. If you live near a busy street with insulated windows you can almost completely block out the noise nowadays (Although you’re still stuck with the pollution and can’t really open the windows), but technology can really counter some of those problems. But i wouldn’t fight the system on my own, so I probably would do the same in your position.

    • RaoulDook@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Why don’t the just build a new liquor store in the middle of the new houses? That solves it all

    • breecher@sh.itjust.works
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      2 months ago

      Considering reality do you blame them? This is hardly satire, just sarcastic pointing out (US) reality.

  • zebidiah@lemmy.ca
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    2 months ago

    And bring local pubs to America! Turn one of those shitty little McMansions into an Alehouse every eight square blocks and you’ve just solved drunk driving!

      • tburkhol@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Heh. I used to commute by bicycle, about 5 miles each way, but a stretch of it was on an 8-lane interstate. Up a steep grade in the morning, maybe 4%, with semi trucks blowing by at 60 mph. Down the same slope in the evening, 40mph past cars backed up at the light at the end of the exit ramp.

      • Thorry84@feddit.nl
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        2 months ago

        Not just the danger of walking on a road where huge trucks drive at high speed, but also trying to avoid the roads by walking through fields or backyards and be shot by the property owner. In much of Europe there is some form of right to roam. Which means there are walking and perhaps biking trails throughout and the owner of any property has to allow people to walk there. They often even have to maintain the trail.

        Near where I live there is a beautiful trail through a couple of farms. And the farmers are very welcoming, fencing off what is dangerous, but keeping a nice trail to walk. They have signs explaining what kind of things they grow and what animals they keep. And warning never to feed the animals, as they get plenty of the right food and stuff like bread etc. usually isn’t very good for them.

        The US is so different, where a person simply walking and enjoying their surroundings is seen as a dangerous invader which needs to be killed.

  • Asafum@feddit.nl
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    2 months ago

    Only a couple of hours to get a snack! You’ll burn off the calories as you get home!

  • Uriel238 [all pronouns]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 months ago

    When I played The Sims 2, the first thing I’d do is create a small public lot where everyone could get all their needs met and buy food and a cell phone (since starting characters didn’t have one). There were some oddities, since Sims get dirty quickly, I’d replace sinks with showers, and would make sure coffee was available everywhere.

    Eventually, sims could walk from their home, rather than investing in a garage and a car or taking a cab.

  • blackn1ght@feddit.uk
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    2 months ago

    Do American suburbs not have the concept of a “corner shop”? Somewhere you can grab some basics by walking there in 5 to 10 minutes?

    • azimir@lemmy.ml
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      2 months ago

      Most are gone. T a combination of being zoned out and people being willing to drive 30 minutes to a big box store instead of walking 5 to a corner market nuked most of them.

      I have a map of where they used to be in my city 100 years ago. (We do transit advocacy and need data on city history.) They used to be every 400m or so across the entire city, but now? Only a few remain.

    • RBWells@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Yes. We have these, they are generally at gas stations! But as I said earlier, I have never been more than a few blocks from a corner store. They are not groceries though. Beer, diet coke, the Wawa by me has also reasonable food and fancy coffee. But if you need flour and produce, no. It’s only stuff you eat without cooking, ready to go things.

      The Walgreens does have more regular stuff, cat food and tape, shampoo, etc. So may be closer to what you are thinking of. There is one of those near me also, but one vs. 3 gas station shops.

      • Soggy@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        They also tend to be at least 30% more expensive than a proper grocery store, so it’s really wasteful to not drive and get a week’s worth of food at a time.

    • scoobford@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      No. They exist, but they basically only have beer, cigarettes, chips, and candy. No actual food.

      They’re also very badly overpriced.

    • LibertyLizard@slrpnk.net
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      2 months ago

      No because they’re quite literally illegal in most neighborhoods. This is starting to change but developers don’t want to do anything different or innovative so they’re still rolling out the same moronic plans we have for the past however many decades.

    • Drusas@fedia.io
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      2 months ago

      They basically only exist in more urban areas, not suburbs. And, as someone else mentioned, they mostly sell garbage.

  • andybytes@programming.dev
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    2 months ago

    America is such a living hell that like I don’t even want to participate in a revolution. It’s just going to be a libturd or right-wing-hog revolution anyways. I really think a lot of my social ills, anxiety and depression just comes from the world I live in. I truly believe I am a product of my environment. I would leave the United States in a heartbeat with just the clothes on my back. The only time I’ve ever been happy is when I was able to commute on my bicycle. Ever since COVID, people have been driving like fucking jackasses. And now I live in an area that I can’t ride my bike no more. I have never been so depressed in my whole fucking miserable life. Like a scientist, I want to see if it’s me or my environment. I think America causes physical and mental illness. I sometimes think if it were up to me and I wasn’t allowed to leave the United States, but I could die in a nuclear explosion and just completely wipe off USA from the face of the earth. I say to myself, I would push that fucking button for future generations, for the world. The world is capitalistic and the Yankee has a lot of leverage, a lot of places in Europe start adopting the Yankee way. It terrifies me, knowing that American culture like the disease that it is Spreads like a plus-filled rash. I am very unhappy. These feelings compile over time. And you’re in such agony. You try to figure out why. And then eventually it clicks. America is a piece of shit.

    • Tiger@sh.itjust.works
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      2 months ago

      You can move out of America, try. I’m an American living abroad for decades now, and left with nearly zero cash and made a great life abroad.

      Plot twist though, everywhere still has problems, just different ones, and the US’ bullcrap affects everyone everywhere including you no matter where you are. (Have why I still care and pay attention to it).

      On the subject of this post, I live in a super walkable city, Shanghai, and do everything by bike (amazing, world class bike lanes), walking, subway, taxi, bus etc. and don’t have or need a car, it’s awesome.